House of Hooch

MSU v SC

2011-10-13T10:19:00.000-07:00

Show Me What I'm Lookin For - Carolina Liar

Save me, I'm lost,
Oh Lord I've been waiting for you.
I'll pay any cost,
To save me from being confused.
Wait, I'm wrong,
I can't do better than this.
I'll pay any cost,
Save me from being confused.

Show me what I'm looking for...
Show me what I'm looking for...
Show me what I'm looking for...
Show me what I'm looking for...
Oh Lord.

Just a S.E.C. -

Have a seat right over here...

Bama v OM - Nick Saban does his best Chris Hansen impression as the Crimson Machine keeps on rolling in what will surely be a rout. Victor: Bama

UGA v Vandy - The 'Dores give the Dogs more than they expect, but not more than they can handle. Victor: UGA

LSU v Tenn - Neyland Stadium looks like a bad orange on Saturday, with the classic Tennessee colors fading into a purple and gold bruise in the stands as the Tiger fans take over in Tennessee. Victor: LSU

Fla v Auburn - It's the Battle of the Embattled QB's on the Plains this weekend, not to be confused with the Battle of the Backup QB's in Starkville. Both teams sit at 4-2, but after Saturday Florida will be moving on and up. Victor: Florida

STOP THE PRESSES!!!

Spurrier kicks Garcia off team, Morris out of room, and a puppy for good measure?!?!
(ok, so we made one of those up...)

NCAA clears Auburn/Newtons of any wrong-doing... NCAA also finds that fire is cold, ice is hot, and dudes don't like hot chicks...

Courtesy of LSUFreek, greatest Farker the world has ever known...

Week in Review -

Insert "That Guy" joke of your choice here...

Who should start? That's the question on every Bulldog's lips (and the poll question, look up at the top-right corner) this week as we head into a game with South Carolina. Chris Relf took the first half against UAB last weekend and produced little offensively. Tyler Russell was given the second half and the Dawgs offense came alive. So who will get the start? You can cast your vote, but Dan Mullen isn't telling...

Truth is, there are good reasons to start both. The offense obviously began to 'click' with Tyler at the helm, but SC's defense is one of the best in the nation at defending both the pass and the run. Tyler looked solid against UAB, but the SEC is a whole different level. Chris gives the Dawgs a legitimate run threat, but if he can't connect on passes there will not be much opening up for the run game. What to do...

My guess? I think Dan will start Tyler, but if there isn't much production from the offense with Russell behind the wheel then look for Relf to be under center by the 2nd quarter. But if SC jumps out to a big lead we will be forced to take to the air, and I just don't see Relf taking many snaps in that scenario the way he's been passing, so that would lend itself to Tyler lining up at QB. It will be interesting, that's for sure...

Keys to the Game -
Both schools have a QB controversy of sorts, with the aforementioned Relf/Russell combo for MSU being up in the air, while SC's QB situation seems to have resolved itself earlier this week when Stephen Garcia was shown the door after his FIFTH violation... (what happened to three strikes and you're out?) Both schools are dealing with on-going or recently concluded QB drama, so I would call this a wash as far as the benefits to the opponents go.

MSU's defense has quietly improved as the season has progressed, but can they put it all together on game day against the Gamecocks? Meanwhile SC's defense is one of the best in the nation, and not what you want to see if you're wearing maroon and white on Saturday...

Offense -

South Carolina's defense is strong against the pass, and pretty good against the run, too. They also force their fair share of turnovers. Protecting the ball (no fumbles/int's) is a must. I would expect Dan and Les Koening to try some bubble screens and option plays with Relf under center, and go to high percentage, short passes and hand-offs when Tyler is in the game. The offensive line will be a little better if they can avoid any further injuries, which will hopefully give the Bulldog's QB (WHOEVER it is...) time to make a pass, but in order to do so both Relf and Russell must be a step quicker than they were last week. They will not be afforded as much time Saturday as they were at UAB.

Defense -
The Bulldog's defense has kept them in most of the games this season, whether or not the offense did their part. I'm still not a big fan of the 7-10 yard cushion that opposing receivers seem to be getting, but it does lend itself to that "bend but don't break" style of defensive play, and that's exactly what they've done.

For the record, this is the only cushioning I can approve...

Remember this defense held #1 LSU to 2 first half field goals and only allowed a touchdown in the 4th quarter. They line up against the likes of Vick Ballard and LaDarius Perkins every week in practice, so I feel confident they can handle Marcus Lattimore. I expect either Banks or Broomfield to have a pick-6 this week, and if we can get that and minimize turnovers it could be the difference in this game.

Bottom Line -

You gonna eat that? -Renardo Sidney

Turnovers. And not the delicious, fruit/cream filled kind... If the Bulldogs want to win they must come out on the winning side of the turnover margin, and find a spark on offense. The defense should be able to hold SC to 2 TD's and a field goal or two. The offense will have to make the most of their opportunities if they want to walk away with the W this weekend...

Final Score -

Wild and Woolly -
MSU 35 SC 24

Realistic -
MSU 17 SC 27

MSU v UAB

2011-10-07T10:57:00.000-07:00

From the Ritz to the Rubble - Arctic Monkeys

Pretty self-explanatory title there... and a damn good song, mind you.

Just a S.E.C. -
UK v SC - South Carolina and Steve Spurrier will tap Conner Shaw as their starting QB this time around, attempting to regroup after losing to Auburn last week. Whoever lines up at QB, this should be a bounce-back game for the Gamecocks. Victory goes to: SC.

Vandy v Bama - The Tide continues rolling, knocking off Florida in convincing fashion last weekend. Nary a stumble to be found in this contest, either, from the looks of it... at least for Alabama. Victory goes to: Bama.

GA v Tenn - Georgia sports losses to Boise State and South Carolina. Tennessee's lone loss is to Florida. In a contest of the Eastern also-rans, this will be a better game than you might expect. Playing in Neyland Stadium gives the Vols the edge. Victory goes to: Tenn.

The Truffle-Shuffle is so last millennium...

Auburn v Ark - Arkansas barely escaped new-kid-on-the-block-to-be Texas A&M last weekend with a dramatic come from behind victory... and at least one Hawg fan was pretty psyched about that. Auburn lost a few weeks ago to Clemson but has rebounded, posting a big win over highly ranked South Carolina most recently. Home field advantage will have the Hogs rolling on, undefeated. Victory goes to: Ark.

Fla v LSU - Florida faces undefeated LSU and a rough double dose of SEC West powerhouses. Having lost to Bama last weekend, the Gators must travel to Baton Rouge to face a scary LSU team. Florida will limp away from this one licking their wounds. Victory goes to: LSU.

Week In Review - Last week MSU lost to Eastern division foe Georgia, in what was essentially an un-funny comedy of errors. Costly turnovers and lack of execution at every position over the course of the game led to the maroon-clad Bulldogs getting in a hole early, thereby forcing MSU to attempt to take to the air, something that has not gone well in recent weeks. Carmon bouncing around to different spots didn't help solidify anything on the offensive line, either.

Pay no attention to the man behind the hedges!

Also, Nickoe Whitley peed on the hedges (allegedly). Frankly, I find this a non-issue. I personally like to 'commune with nature' when I have the opportunity, and I'm sure he was only thinking of the fans when he decided to exhibit a bit of modesty and hide his 'exposure' in the bushes, lest some old blue-hair have a coronary.

Keys to the Game - This week MSU faces a UAB team that they narrowly avoided losing to at home last year. With the injuries the Bulldogs are saddled with, it's important to get the young guys experience, quickly. If Dan Mullen can find a permanent spot for Carmon and let him anchor the line, we should see some progress from the O-line, and by extension, the offense.

MSU Recievers: "They look like big, strong hands..."

Offense - Chris Relf and his wide receivers need to have a 'come to Jesus' meeting, like yesterday. It's 50/50 on bad passes and missed catches... Then there's the O-line which has been riddled with injuries. This game will be a great opportunity for the offense to get back on the right track, but it will not be a cakewalk. UAB played MSU frighteningly close in Starkville last season, and they have something to prove coming into the game 0-4.

Defense - MSU's defense did pretty much all you could ask of them the past few weeks. Keep in mind, MSU played the defending national champions on the road, and #1 team in the nation at home in back to back weeks. Their performance has been lacking at times, but they've performed close to expectations for most realistic fans. The problem for the Dawgs has been the offense and their lack of execution. For all the heat Chris Wilson has taken (and I've thrown some around myself) they are doing enough to keep MSU in these games.

Final Score -

Wild and Woolly Prediction -
MSU 35 UAB 7

Realistic Prediction -
MSU 27 UAB 17

MSU v Georgia

2011-09-30T14:01:00.000-07:00

It's a Dawg Fight!

George Clinton and the Parliamentary Funkadelic - Atomic Dog

The blog is going to take a detour this week... we won't be doing all the regular features, so that we can instead bring you this lovely little story about friends, football and alcohol...

Mr. Mitch's Wild Ride -

So this week's blog will be a little different, for reasons you're about to find out. I did not really have an opportunity to watch the game, although I had a ticket and was actually in the stands for the first half, so I can only comment on the info I've received about the game secondhand and what I've read in the post-game aftermath.

Please note, all names have been changed to protect the guilty. Yes, guilty.

So my friend, we'll call him Mitch, he is an MSU alumnus and football fan. He bought a set of season tickets with me so he could attend any of our homegames provided he could get the time off from work. His first game to attend this season was the LA Tech game this past weekend.

We start the weekend off by going downtown and having a great time eating and drinking with friends, and watching one of our old friends from college play an accoustic set. The next morning we rise and shine and start prepping for gameday. We get the cooler, stock it full of beer and mixers, and head off to campus. After we make 'the drop' at the tailgate we go and park my car in the Cotton District at Stagger Inn (decent little sports bar if you're ever in the area). We go inside, have a great lunch and a couple of beers while watching the first half of the Georgia/Ole Miss game.

After a while I noticed a sign on the wall for Jim Beam - Devil's Cut. I'm not going to go into the whole process, but basically when making bourbon there is an Angel's Share and a Devil's Cut, which are both considered to be lost in the process of making the bourbon. Apparently Jim Beam figured out a way to get the Devil's Cut, that is the alcohol that has been soaked up by the wooden barrels in which it's aged, back out of the wood. I was intrigued and I do enjoy my bourbon from time to time, so I thought I'd buy a round for myself and my two friends, Mitch and Jerry.

At this point Mitch tells me he's ok with beer, but with liquor he sorta has trouble 'pacing himself.' I've known him a long time and knew what he was talking about, but thought to myself, "What's the harm in having one? He can keep his pace..." The Devil's Cut was a hit, and we decided to wrap the party up and move it to the tailgate.

At the tailgate I mix myself the old standby, Captain and Coke. (I love it so much my dogs are named Captain and Morgan...) Mitch has himself a couple of beers (pacing and all) and Jerry, our other friend from back in the day, is enjoying his Jack Daniel's. Around two hours before kickoff Mitch breaks out this 'great new liquor' he's found called Blackheart. He mixes himself a drink and then mixes one for me. I took one drink and gave it away. It was god-awful, like someone mixed Southern Comfort with rain water from Bourbon Street the day after Mardi Gras ends. Mitch says he likes it... Whatever, buddy. Enjoy.

So about 30 minutes before kickoff we begin making our way to the stadium and I get separated from Mitch and Jerry. Luckily I spot them again when I get up the ramp to our seats at the first concession stand. In the typical "slightly tipsy, excited about an upcoming sporting event" manner I proceed to run up and give a shoulder check to Mitch. He stumbles a bit more than I expect and when he turns around his eyes are damn near crossed. Immediately I think "Oh hell, here we go... no more for Mitch until after the game." So for a little damage control Mitch buys one of those big, soft pretzels to hopefully settle his stomach, and a coke.

You're doing it wrong...

We go and sit at one of the tables on the concourse, and Jerry and myself are standing on the opposite side of the table from Mitch, talking when we hear the tell-tale sounds of sputtering. Looking around we see Mitch has 'rejected' his recently ingested pretzel all over the table. We give the obligatory damnations and send him to the bathroom, ostensibly for the purposes of cleaning himself up and getting any more of that shit out of his system before we go to our seats.

He comes back a few minutes later and appears none the worse for wear, but definitely not any better, either. We proceed into the stands to find a good spot to watch the game. As an aside, our seats suck but that is our own fault for missing the season ticket deadline a few years ago. As a result we are shoved in the very southernmost section on the east side, basically looking at the side/back of the jumbotron. For that reason we tend to 'squat' in other seats.

Before you get all uppity about our squatting, know this. We look for open seats, and when we find them we ask the people sitting there if anyone is sitting in them. If they say no, I explain how our seats suck but if the ticket holders come along we will gladly move, we just want a better view, no harm no foul. Never had a problem before.

Anyway, we find a great spot, three wide and nobody sitting in front of us (thank god for THAT). The crowd noise is pretty loud, as are the songs and effects coming from the speakers, and of course the cowbells. Mitch sits between Jerry and myself and immediately puts on his hat and sunglasses, and props his head up in his hands.

Kickoff ensues, and I notice Mitch has slumped a little more, and has now folded his arms across his knees and has his head down resting on his arms. As there wasn't really a lot anyone could do for him I just let him be, figuring the worst was behind us. Oh how wrong I was...

At some point during the first quarter Mitch has now slid entirely off his seat and is sitting on the concrete, bracing his back against the seat. He still has his head down between his knees, but has drawn his feet up a little more, getting closer and closer to the beloved-by-all-drunks fetal position.

MSU scores a touchdown, the crowd goes wild, I jump up and start ringing my cowbell. Jerry does the same, albeit a bit slower, but then Jerry is a bit slower at just about everything. I look down to check on Mitch and discover that he has dug really deep, and not in a good way. He's busted out the technicolor yawn all over the concrete between his feet. He's called Ralph and Earl, and unfortunately without the aid of the porcelain telephone. Yes, he has jettisoned the chunky cargo... I call Jerry's attention to this. Jerry looks at me and shrugs. Thanks Jerry.

The clock is now ticking. If and when this gets noticed we will need to be elsewhere or face the wrath of the stadium gestapo. I am now entirely disregarding the football game (I was told after the fact that I didn't miss much, but still if I had my choice.....) and trying to coax Mitch into going back to the bathroom, or better yet, the tailgate. Unfortunately for those of you who are aware of the phases of the classic drunken stupor, Mitch is now in the 'immovable' stage. He can't focus, he can't speak, and he certainly can't stand or walk. He also can't stop 'spommiting.'

The legendary liquid scream...

Spommit (verb, noun) is a phrase coined for Mitch due to his volcanic nature of regurgitation. While most people open their mouths and let it all come out like a flood, Mitch fights it as hard as he can, and in doing so he squeezes his lips shut. So what happens when someone vommits in their mouths and forces their lips shut? Spommit, that's what. It's like a small-scale projectile vommit, typically with a cone-shaped dispersion pattern. During our college days Mitch had perfected the art of grabbing a nearby (usually empty) glass or cup and discretely depositing his unwanted stomach contents in it. Unfortunately he is now out of practice.

I'll be right back!

So Mitch is slowly releasing burst after burst of partially-digested grossness onto the pavement and I try to recruit Jerry to help with an extraction. Jerry, however, is more focused on Jerry's need to pee. I implore Jerry not to go because I know the second he moves the family of four seated on the other side of him will notice Mitch's handiwork and call for help. Jerry insists he will be fast and no one will notice, and drunk Jerry doesn't listen any better than sober Jerry, who is pretty piss-poor at it anyway. So as Jerry is walking down the steps I look at the scoreboard and suddenly I feel like -I- might be sick, but for a very different reason. In focusing all my efforts on minimizing the damage from Mitch I lost track of time, and Jerry has gone to take a piss with 10 seconds left in the first half. Oh yeah, you'll be right back.

Halftime: People walking past, wrinkling their noses, me giving weak apologies and continually trying to move the immovable object while he continues to unleash the unstoppable force. I am also frantically calling and texting Jerry for assistance... and let me just take a moment right here to give a big F U to AT&T for their continually shitty service on game days. Anyway, as the teams run on to the field to start the second half I see two uniformed police officers round the corner at the bottom of the steps and the dad from the family of four to our right points out Mitch. In the words of some Anheuser Busch ad exec, "Here we go."

The officers come up and proceed to grab Mitch by the shoulder and shake him, rather violently. "Oh lord, don't do that!" I said, concerned they are going to make matters worse.

Old cop: Well, he ain't stayin here.
Me: I understand but I've tried moving him and he won't move.
Old cop: Oh he's gonna move whether or not he likes it. He's being arrested for public intoxication.
Me: I understand that, but could you at least clear a path? I don't want him "marking up" anyone on his way out.

Yeeeeaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!

Old cop: *sigh* fine.

Young cop clears the row, they both put on gloves and lift Mitch by the elbows. Luckily Mitch has ejected the majority of his ballast, and thus avoids any incidents while in motion. As they are escorting him down the steps they are asking him a barrage of questions such as "Have you been drinking tonight?" "How much have you had to drink?" "Do you have any alcohol on you?" etc. Mitch's answer to every question is "I'm sorry." Now we're at the apologetic drunk phase. I've been in full-on damage control mode since sometime in the first quarter, so I chime in with responses for him, such as "He's had a couple drinks, yeah, but I think it's that pizza. I took a bite and spit it out, it was so nasty." Did the cops buy this? Probably not, but plausible deniability and all that....

As we are walking through the concourse I spot Jerry, leaned up against a pole with his phone to his ear. We walk right in front of him, and as his semi-glazed over eyes appear to focus on Mitch and widen I'm in his face, grabbing his shoulder and saying "Dude, help." I turn around to catch up with the cops thinking Jerry is now on board as well, which gives me a little hope. I don't know what good Jerry could've done, but at least we'll all go down together, right?

Wrong. We get to the elevator and while the cops are commadeering it I turn around expecting to see Jerry right there behind me. Nope. Nothing. Nada. Jerry has ditched us. Thanks Jerry. So I hop on the express elevator to hell and while we're riding down one of the cops asks me "Are we going to find any weapons on him?" Now in my mind I'm thinking guns, machetes, nunchucks. I actually laughed at the notion. "Him? No way..."

We get down to the mobile booking station and they pat him down, pulling out his wallet, his phone, and a pocket knife. I actually cringed because I had no idea he had it, and apologized profusely, but the cops seemed unconcerned after the litanny of apologies spewing forth from Mitch's mouth. They also confiscate four untouched airline sized bottles of Blackheart. During all of this Mitch is sitting indian-style on the ground, head down and swaying (and still apologizing, I guess at this point to the spirits of the Indian Burial Ground which Davis Wade Stadium is built on).

Once the officer takes Mitch's information from his license he turns to me...

Young Cop: I need your information, too.
Me: Whoa, wait... what do you need my info for? I didn't do anything...
Young Cop: If we're gonna release him to you we need your info.
Me: If, by that, you mean I can take him away from here and neither of us is going to jail then I'm happy to give you my info.
Young Cop: Ok, so gimme your info then...

Information is given and all of Mitch's possessions (minus four airline sized bottles) are returned to him. As I'm hauling Mitch to his feet Young Cop decides to show off for his buddies. He puffs out his chest and turns to Mitch and declares "Now, if we catch you trying to come back into this game..."

I cut Young Cop off laughing so hard I nearly pissed myself. While I do understand that some drunken douchebags might get kicked out and try to sneak back in, even this guy could see that Mitch, being in the state he was in, had no idea where he was or that there was even a game going on. Young Cop deflates slightly and finishes his sentence, "...we'll arrest you for disturbing the peace and public intoxication."

With tears of laughter in my eyes at the notion of Mitch trying to pull a stunt like that I apologize for laughing and thank the officers, and we head back to the tailgate. Once back at the tailgate I have Mitch recline on a nice, comfy patch of grass and begin to pull his shit together.(see below)

Looks comfy to me... he's fiiiiine.

Once he's settled I look around at neighboring tailgates' televisions to discover we're in overtime against LA Tech. Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. As if this night wasn't bad enough already, we're clawing and scraping to escape Louisianna Tech? Luckly (and I do mean LUCKILY) we pull out the win and slowly my friends start to reappear at the tailgate. I go to the cooler to make myself a drink and that's when I realize what went wrong.

DO NOT WANT.

Mitch bought a fifth of Blackheart. Mitch made three drinks. I gave the one he made me away because it tasted like SoCo poured out of a crackwhore's ass. He drank the other two. After three drinks the bottle was approximately 90-95% empty. So Mitch took down almost 2/3's of a fifth of some sugary-sweet nastiness in about 45 minutes or so. Anyway, I'm forced to relay the story of our being escorted from the stadium repeatedly as new friends appear, but that's ok because we didn't end up in jail, and really, isn't that what friends are for?

The next day when I relate this little tale to Mitch he laughs heartily at himself and thanks me profusely for keeping his ass out of jail. I then inform him he is no longer allowed to drink Blackheart. He has agreed to this punishment. When I asked him why the hell he made his drinks so strong his reply was, "They just tasted so good!" I have to wonder if he'd feel the same if he could remember the way it tasted the second time around...

Now that we have that out of the way...

MSU plays Georgia this weekend if anybody cares. Should be a good game. The key to the game will be turnovers. Stay on the winning side of the turnover margin and the Western Dogs should win out. Having Carmon back should help the offense if he can contribute without further injury. Yadda yadda yadda... it's been a busy week.

FINAL SCORE -

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 35 - GA 21

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 14 - GA 27

MSU v LA Tech

2011-09-23T11:00:00.000-07:00

Monster Magnet - Spacelord

I left my throne a million miles away.
I drink from your tit,
I sing your blues every day.
Now give me the strength
To split the world in two, yeah.
I ate all the rest and now I've gotta eat you...

JUST A S.E.C. - Hey look! More new stuff! This week we kick off a new segment where we take a look around the conference and see how the other half lives. So please, give us Just a S.E.C....

R.E.M. calling it quits?
Say it ain't so!!

OM vs GA - Our neighbors to the north have a pivotal game on the slate for Saturday, facing the embattled Mark Richt and his Georgia Bulldogs. I say pivotal because when the clock strikes zero on this game, one coach's arse will be squarely on the hot seat. Look for that arse to belong to the Right and Honorable Reverend Houston Dale Nutt, Esquire. However, if the odds-makers are wrong by giving 10.5 points in favor of the Bulldogs then look for Mark Richt to go all R.E.M.

Bama vs Ark - One of the highlights of the weekend will definitely be the match-up between the Hogs and the Tide. It's the SEC's top offense squaring off against the SEC's top defense, and it's going to have league-wide implications. The winner of this game puts themselves in position to win the West, and from there a win in the SEC championship game will likely put them in place to play for the national title.

Fla vs UK - While many MSU fans are upset about losing 12 straight to LSU, and rightly so, how about a little perspective? Florida has won twentyfive straight games against Kentucky. Twenty. Five. That pretty much tells you all you need to know about this match-up. Sorry, Kats.

South Carolina vs Vandy - Two teams out of the East that don't typically spring to mind first when you think of undefeated after three weeks would be SC and Vandy, but entering this weekend they both sport a 3-0 record. Marcus Lattimore is a legitimate rushing threat to compliment Stephen Garcia's passing game, but SC has yet to put together a solid performance for all 60 minutes yet. Meanwhile, Vanderbilt is coming off a solid win against Ole Miss and James Franklin has the Commodores playing beyond themselves. Don't be surprised to see Vandy give the Gamecocks all they can handle on Saturday.

Auburn vs FAU - The Tigers face Florida Atlantic this weekend, in what should be a rout. Gus Malzhan will ensure that Auburn recovers from last weekend's loss to Clemson and gets back on the winning side of things.

Hey Coach Nutt, Coach Richt!
We got your seat right here!

LSU vs WVU - The other Tigers travel to Morgantown, WV to take on the Mountaineers Saturday in an SEC/Big East contest. Both teams sit at 3-0, with LSU ranked #2 and WVU ranked #16, and QB Gino Smith figures to test the lightning fast LSU defense with his arm. Smith is currently slinging around 70% of his passing successfully, so this will be a true test for the Tiger defense.

Peepin' Croom in all his glory...

PICK OF THE SIX - This week's Pick of the Six features a great weekly thread from Six Pack Speak, the Fark Off competition. In this weekly competition, readers are given source pics and a few rules as guidance, and tasked to come up with some fun, funny and creative pics that involve MSU and/or the opponents. A little creativity with Peepin' Croom, a Six Pack legacy, garnered this thread a spot in the Six Pack Remembers forum, where some of the greatest posts from the board's history are archived for posterity. Grats to mechdawg for his creativity.

Can you feel the bro-mance?

LAST WEEK - Last week the LSU defense flew into Starkville below radar and proceeded to lay an embarrassing beat down on MSU's offense. Tyrann Mathieu was Slider to Morris Claiborne's Iceman, with the pair netting 2 INT's (Claiborne) and 10 tackles (Matthieu) between them. Now admittedly LSU will likely end up having a top 10 defense in the country when it's all said and done, but the Bulldog faithful still expected a little more from the offense. The fact that there were no touchdowns by either team going into the fourth quarter is a testament to how hard the D work on both sides of the field Saturday. LSU's offense is nothing to laugh at, and the MSU defense made some good adjustments after letting a close one slip away to Auburn the week before. Frankly, as an MSU fan I am more upset about the Auburn loss than LSU, but Dan Mullen is reaping what he's sown by raising the fan base's expectations now. Can he rally the troops and right the ship this week?


-Are we pretty yet?! -No. -DRINK MOAR!

THIS WEEK - In a word, yes. This weeks ~~patsy~~ opponent is LA Tech out of the WAC, and if you don't think Dan Mullen, Les Koenning and the rest of the MSU offense is not only relieved but licking their collective chops at the prospect of throwing down an epic beatdown on the lil' bulldogs from Louisiana you're fooling yourself. Mississippi State apparently drew the ire of the scheduling gods the last few seasons, having to face off against the likes of LSU and Auburn in the first 3-4 games of the season. Admittedly the road is never easy in the SEC, but what I wouldn't give to trade Auburn or LSU out for an earlier meeting with Ole Miss, or better yet an out-of-conference foe? Speaking of Ole Miss, have you heard? The wheels are coming off faster than a sorostitutes clothes after five apple-tinis. There's this, and this, and even this. Oh, and this, too. Not. Good.

KEYS TO THE GAME - No secrets here, just make sure we minimize mistakes and focus on fundamentals. Say, that was kinda catchy, wasn't it? "Minimize mistakes, focus on fundamentals."(TM) Boom, now you gotta pay me to use that, coach...

You keep using that word...

Anyway, MSU can, should and will win by at least 2 touchdowns. Anything less and the Bulldogs will still have much of the fanbase questioning how much progress they're making. This is not meant as a slight to LA Tech, but let's pull out a couple of analogies here. 1) Big brother, little brother. Big bro's got 3-4 years on ya, there, little fellah. You're not gonna be dunking on him anytime soon. 2) Pack dynamics. We're the full-grown bulldog, you're the pup. You're not gonna be the alpha anytime soon, either. This isn't the same team that lost to Maine. Losing to LA Tech is simply inconceivable. INCONCEIVABLE!!!

OFFENSE - It's hard to say that MSU's offense made any progress from weeks 2 to 3, but squaring off against one of the top defenses in the country can have that effect. That being said, I personally think Chris Relf and the WR corps are largely responsible. Connect on a few of those passes and we continue to move the chains. Continue to move the chains and we are in a position to score, and also give LSU a much longer field to work with. Just as a few missed/dropped passes cost us the games against Auburn in 2010 and 2011, it also cost us against LSU. Chris Relf must return to the form he was in at the end of last season, and during the Gator Bowl blowout of Michigan, if opposing defenses are going to take him seriously as a passing threat. Otherwise it's stack the box and stuff the run.

DEFENSE - MSU's defense should finally be able to showcase some progress this weekend, which is definitely going to be a weight off Chris Wilson's shoulders. LA Tech's offense was able to keep pace with Case Keenum and Houston last weekend, although they ended up on the losing side of that contest. You can expect the combo of Banks and Broomfield to take at least one pick to the house this weekend, and unless the D line falls asleep on their feet there's not much of a rushing threat to be seen. Look for lots of rotation throughout the defensive side of the ball as MSU gets more reps for their backups at every position.

BOTTOM LINE - The SEC Dawgs walk away victorious, and honestly, was there ever really a doubt? Dan Mullen has changed expectations for the Bulldogs, and his next step is to win those 'close call' games with SEC-caliber opponents. Looking ahead to another dogfight next weekend between the Hedges, the maroon-clad Bulldogs must tighten up to prepare for Georgia, and Dan will use this game as a teaching experience.

FINAL SCORE -

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 47 LA Tech 0

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 41 LA Tech 10

Where's my rubber ducky?

For all the LA Tech fans experiencing a fit of rage after reading this (yes, all three of you) all I can tell you is it's not going to be pretty. Terry Bradshaw would be well advised to go have a beer with Frank Caliendo's John Madden and talk about Sunday's NFL matchups, because any way you slice it this will be a slaughter. If you disagree then click the link at the top and shoot me an email... I'll be sure to take the craziest rants and post them here for all to see. Cheers!

Bulldogs and Tigers and Corndogs, oh my!

2011-09-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

Tool - Bottom

Shit adds up, shit adds up, shit adds up, shit adds up at the bottom...

If I let you, you would make me destroy myself.
In order to survive you, i must first survive myself.
I can sink no further, and I cannot forgive you.
There's no choice but to confront you, to engage you, to erase you.
I've gone to great lengths to expand my threshold of pain...
I will use my mistakes against you, there's no other choice.
I'm shameless now, I'm nameless now, I'm nothing now, I'm no one now.
But my soul must be iron 'cause my fear is naked...
I'm naked and fearless...
And my fear is naked!

Last week's first ever poll for this week's theme song ended in a tie (2 whole votes!), so I made an executive decision following the Auburn game to go with a alternative that is far more apropos given the results. Shit adds up at the bottom, after all. But that's not what this selection is about...

I chose that particular excerpt of lyrics for a very good reason. Ok two reasons... first off, the song is just badass. But also, this song isn't just about "shit happens" or "shit rolls down hill" or any of that. It's more like "shit happens, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let you dictate the shit that happens to me. I will rise above your short-sighted, preconceived notions of what you believe I should be and reinvent myself." And that is exactly what this MSU team will have to do if they want a chance at knocking off arguably the best team in the country in week 3.

PICK OF THE SIX -

Sexy maaan, sexy maaaan!

We're starting a new feature this week on the blog, the Pick of the Six. This is where I post a link to a funny/informative/entertaining thread from the Six Pack Speak website. This is a great website for all things MSU, and if you're not on there yet you're already behind the game. A few important notes: I highly recommend you DO NOT dive in and start posting right away. Read more, post less is the name of the game here. Also, 17 is not a number, it's an expletive. And finally, you'd do well not to offer any grammar/spelling advice as you'll only be exposing and embarrassing yourself, even if your write. (see what I did there?) The Pick of the Six will vary depending on the day of the week, the upcoming/previous opponents and quality of board content, but I'm sure you'll be entertained.

And with that, I give you this week's Pick of the Six: Coach34's Sunday Morning QB - Auburn Edition. Now a little background on Coach34, he is the number one troll on the Six Pack and he's not afraid to stir the pot. Half the time (half? ok, 90%) he posts shit to get folks riled up, but he knows a thing or two about football and he is a true fan. Also he's kind of an ass, but that's a prerequisite for trolls anyway...

LAST WEEK -
They say the most improvement happens between week one and week two, but there is (or at least should be) a caveat to that. The most improvement is going to happen after you're able to accurately assess your abilities. Memphis did not test MSU's defense, and so the question marks remained question marks instead of turning into exclamation marks. But now that Auburn has exposed the issues at hand for this defense, those questions can at least be addressed. Disregarding the short week, you can expect to see some significant adjustments on the defensive side of the ball.

Must fight urge to photoshop 'f' onto shirt!

So my predictions may have been wrong, but I was right about a few key factors. The offenses were able to move the ball and score almost at will, MSU ran the ball quite well, and Guz Malzhan fine tuned his offense to a much improved result. As I told some friends in casual conversation, I was a little concerned to see the numbers that Auburn's special teams unit put up, as that's where most of their yardage came from vs. Utah State(Auburn rushing: 78 yds, Auburn special teams [returning yardarge]: 270 yds) and what that meant for our kicking game/special teams situations. Turns out I was right to be worried. Auburn's special teams are, in a word, special. I may end up eating crow thanks to my parting shot at Auburn in the pre-game blog... but we'll cook that bird when we come to it. Meanwhile MSU has yet to find a kicker that can consistently produce touch backs, and that resulted in many short field opportunities for the Tigers, while the Bulldogs had to go to work inside their own 20 yard line more times than any coach likes to see. I mean is it really that hard to find a hot-ass coed who can boot the pigskin 75 yards? Hell, if Kathy Ireland can do it...

THIS WEEK - This is a short week, so the Bulldogs got back to work less than 24 hours after the humbling loss to Auburn. LSU put on a clinic in week one against a very good Oregon team who turned around and pounded out some frustrations on Nevada to the tune of 69 points. The smart money is on LSU to coast to a win here, but in football terminology that translates into "Trap Game." Will the Bayou Bengals be focused? Will Chris Wilson make the necessary adjustments? Why do LSU fans smell like corn dogs? Will the Bulldogs be over the loss? Will ESPN send an uber-hottie sideline reporter? All these answers and much more on the next episode of Soap... er, wait. Sorry, I get distracted easily... Right! On with the show!

KEYS TO THE GAME -
This week the Bulldogs have a daunting task ahead of them. LSU is loaded at nearly every position, even after losing their starting QB and another player due to some off the field shenanigans. After the gut-wrenching loss on the Plains MSU returns home for their season and conference home opener. Can Mississippi State collect themselves and put an improved product on the field, and if so will it be enough to keep LSU from steamrolling the Bulldogs for a 12th straight time?
In a word, maybe. As I said earlier, the Auburn loss was valuable from a self-evaluation stand point for our defense. Whereas Memphis barely tested our 2nd and 3rd string defense, Auburn exposed some weaknesses in players, schemes and techniques. So this is MSU's "week two" and we will see what sort of adjustments are made to staunch the bleeding. Can Chris Wilson rally his troops and make the necessary adjustments or will he go the way of the Torbushes or the Joe Lee Dunns of the world?

OFFENSE -
Dan Mullen has definitely improved the product MSU is putting on the field, there is no doubt about that. Even in the disheartening loss to Auburn, Mississippi State was able to put up solid offensive numbers. 333 rushing yards, 198 passing yards... both of these eclipse Auburn's efforts on the day. The difference was special teams and starting field position. The offense needs their defense and special teams to put them in a more favorable position if they're going to beat the Tigers.

A few injuries to the offensive line did not help matters, although Mullen feels Quentin Saulsberry will be available Thursday night. Dillon Day put in some good time in his absence, leaving many to wonder if Saulsberry wouldn't be better off moving to a guard position and letting Day handle the snaps going forward. Still, LSU is stacked on both O and D lines, so this unit will have their work cut out for them. Look for MSU to continue to look to Vick Ballard as the workhorse of the offense, with Chris Relf also sneaking in a surprising number of yards with his own two feet. LaDarius Perkins is not to be forgotten either, but speaking of forgotten, where the hell is Robert Elliot? The buzz out of the spring was that he had returned to his pre-injury greatness and his speed would astound and amaze. Certainly it couldn't hurt to throw a wrinkle out for Les Miles' crew to deal with?

DEFENSE -
Where do you start? Missed tackles, soft coverage, bad scheming... the list goes on. It's too early to start the fireChrisWilson.com chatter just yet, but he's definitely got something to prove if he wants the Bulldog faithful to remain in his camp. Unfortunately for him, LSU is not quite the punching bag you hope to see when you're looking to get over a loss and put up some better stats for a little bit of the feel-good magic.

But it's not all bad. Corey Broomfield is proving himself a valuable asset, as is Johnathan Banks who had an interception returned for TD Saturday. Cam Lawrence also posted some solid stats, with 14 tackles, 12 solo, and 1 sack for a 10 yard loss. If you want to take a positive away from the negative, it's that one of the underlying problems is fundamentals, which is coachable (is that a word? ...well it is now!) and correctable. The defense has to get back to the basics, namely finishing tackles, in order to get back in the game. Do that, and we should see marked improvement from the D, even against the likes of LSU.

BOTTOM LINE -
I'd love to say it's about who wants it more... as Gene Hackman says in The Replacements, "Heart." But LSU is the proverbial Goliath to MSU's David. MSU is more likely to find themselves looking up from the quicksand than they are to be looking down from the mountaintop. The question is whether or not Dan and his Bulldogs can shake the loss to Auburn, move on in this short week, and really get up for the game Thursday night.

There is an awful lot going in favor of MSU, believe it or not. Home opener. SEC opener. Thursday night game. ESPN will be on hand. Oh, and let's not forget the cowbells. All of these will have the home crowd whipped into a frenzy, and the team can and should feed off that energy. Will it be enough?

FINAL SCORE -
MSU started last season 1-2 after three games, so the world doesn't end if they lose to the Tigers Thursday night. However the road to Atlanta would essentially be closed if that ends up being the case. Still, it's a young season and anything could happen. As much as I'd like to predict a win, it's so unlikely that even I am hesitant. With that said...

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 24 - LSU 21

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 21 - LSU 42

Yeah yeah, I hear you... that's what a wild and woolly prediction is for, though. If you look back at my past prognostications you'll see I don't always predict MSU to win, even in wild and woolly fashion, but this team's offense is going to sneak up and surprise someone this season, and I'd sure like that someone to be #2 LSU. So if you take issue with anything I've said here then just drop me an email by hitting the link at the top. Also be sure to vote for next week's theme song, and check back with us next week for a very bold prediction regarding MSU upcoming match with LA Tech... oh wordplay, how I love thee.

Woolly Bully!!!! Woolly Bully...

Catch a Tiger by the tail...

2011-09-09T11:56:00.000-07:00

Survivor - Eye of the Tiger (Rocky Balboa edition)

Risin' up, straight to the top,
Have the guts, got the glory.
Went the distance, now I'm not gonna stop,
Just a man and his will to survive...

It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight.
Risin' up to the challenge of our rival...
And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night,
And he's watchin' us all in the eye of the tiger...

Ok, ok, I know what you're thinking... "A little cliche on the musical selection, don't you think, Hooch?" Well, two things: 1) That's "MISTER Hooch" to you, junior, and 2) when you play three different Tiger teams three weeks in a row, you'd be hard-pressed NOT to throw in at least a passing reference to this song, so why not embrace it? Also, speaking of songs there is now a poll for you to vote on what you want next week's theme song to be, so make sure to cast your vote right over there =============>

Now that we've got that out of the way...

MSU faces an Auburn team that is vastly different from the National Championship team of last year. Cam Newton is gone, as are upwards of 15 starters on both sides of the ball. Meanwhile MSU returns nearly all their starters from last year, including the new and improved Chris Relf (now with authentic passing-action!) and a WR core that is as deep as it's ever been for the Bulldogs.

Still, Auburn has built a program which is a consistent SEC contender, so it would be a huge mistake to underestimate the Tigers, even though they looked less than stellar against Utah State in their opening game last week. And when I say "less than stellar" I mean they had to score, recover an on-side kick, and score aGAIN with less than 3 minutes to go in the game to pull out the win.

With only one week's worth of footage and info it's hard to read too much into anything, but when you consider that Mississippi State laid 59 on opening patsy Memphis while Auburn struggled to come away with a 4 point win in the last 30 seconds, it's hard not to have some expectations. As any good college football fan will tell you, though, the most improvement is typically seen from the first to second weeks. With that in mind, let's get to it!

KEYS TO THE GAME -

OFFENSE -
The Mississippi State offense apparently picked up right where they left off in January after drubbing Michigan to the tune of 52-14. In fact, the Bulldogs scorched Memphis for 645 yards of total offense, setting a new school record. Dan Mullen clearly has the offense firing on all cylinders, but will it be enough to get past Auburn?
In a word, yes. Auburn looked largely porous against Utah State's running game, allowing them to net 227 yards on the ground. Word out of Auburn is that the play calling for this weekend will be more simplified in an effort to give the new players a chance to acclimate themselves to the system. While that might seem good on the surface, the underlying meaning is that the defense could not effectively read plays and adjust. That will be a serious issue when dealing with a Dan Mullen coached offense and a senior quarterback who can just as easily tuck the ball and pick up a first down, or toss it out to one of the many WR's for a potential big play.

DEFENSE -
Gus Malzhan is certainly no slouch. The man parlayed a talented high school QB into an assistant coaching gig at Arkansas, and rode the coaching rails from there, with his most recent stop as the OC for Auburn's National Championship team last season. Against Utah State the Tigers posted 286 yards through the air, and just 78 yards rushing, though. Malzhan will certainly having his offense clicking better this weekend, but it's hard to imagine the Tigers beating the Bulldogs on the ground. Chris Wilson is likely to pull a few guys back into coverage often in order to hedge his bets that Barrett Trotter is going to try to beat them with the pass.
This, then, will be the true test of one of the most worrisome positions on the field for the MSU defense. Will the Dawgs' DB's be up to the task of stopping a legit SEC team's passing game? Or will Auburn "skull-fuck [MSU]" through the air as one Auburn poster so eloquently put it in a very entertaining thread on a random internet message board. (full quote from poster known as Where Eagles Dare - "Auburn would have skull fucked the shit out of MSU last year if we played later in the season. Your team is pure shit and Relf is a homeless version of some random dumb nig QB." Nice work, W.E.D. ... Glad you found time to throw in the racial epithet while you were exemplifying everything that is high-class about your school.**)

(** - These are known as sarcasterisks. Any word, phrase, sentence or paragraph preceding sarcasterisks should be read with a sarcastic tone. Pretty straight forward, really...)

BOTTOM LINE -

SCORING -
This game has all the makings of a shoot-out, and I would not be surprised to find the final box score strongly resembling that of the Auburn/Arkansas game of a year ago. In the end, the team with the most points on the scoreboard when the clock strikes zero will win. (Thank you, John Madden...) Ultimately, the veteran Dawgs defense will come away more successful than Auburn's, and Mississippi State walks out of Jordan-Hare Stadium with a 2-0 record and 5 short days to game plan for a tough, tough LSU team on Thursday night.

FINAL SCORE -
Last week I was moderately close with my realistic prediction of 47-10 (final score was 59-14), and I feel confident my predictions this week will be in the ballpark as well. As I said above, though, this has all the makings of a shoot-out, so it's entirely possible that you could add 2-3 scores on both sides of the equation, however I feel the margin of victory will remain relatively constant. So, that being said...

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 47 Auburn 14

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 35 Auburn 24

What's that, War Eagle? You think I'm crazy? Well why not drop me a line and let me know at houseofhooch@gmail.com, or just scroll back to the top of the page and hit the link on the right? If Auburn wins you can spam me until your heart's content with "Neener-neener's" and "Told ya so's", and let's be honest, you probably don't have a whole lot more to look forward to this season, soooo....

Party Rockin...

2011-08-23T08:48:00.000-07:00

Party Rock Antehm

"Every day I'm shufflin..."

It's game week, bitches! At the time of this posting kickoff will be a mere 6 days away and speculation will have reached a fevered pitch, no doubt. But with the first opponent will we really see all that MSU has to offer for the coming season?

In a word, no. Mississippi State enters the season with a ranking of 20 for the first time in a decade or more, and their first opponent is the Memphis Tigers team which weighs in at a ranking of 120. That's one hundred and twenty. I think there are 121 Div-1 football teams total, soooooo yeah.

KEYS TO THE GAME -

OFFENSE -
The MSU Bulldogs wrapped a stellar 2010 season by hanging 52 points on the storied Michigan Wolverines. You can see a great highlight reel here, good work, TXMudDawg! The 2011-12 offense figures to be much the same, if not incrementally better. Chris Relf really showed progress in the later half of the season with his passing game, and is expected to be one of the premier QB's of the SEC this year. Then there's the stable of backs, namely Vick Ballard, LaDarius Perkins, and freshly rehabbed running machine, Robert Elliot. THEN there's the slew of receivers. Chad Bumphis, Arceto Clark, Michael Carr, Brandon Heavens, Jameon Lewis, etc. etc. etc. The only question on the offensive side of the ball is at the line, where some shuffling and retooling will take place. Injuries not withstanding there won't be much drop-off there.
The key to the offense for the Memphis game? Well that's easy... just play your game and avoid injuries. The Bulldogs are likely to jump out to a 2-3 touchdown lead in the first quarter, which would be a beneficial situation for the 2nd and 3rd stringers across the board. Chris Relf will probably be on the sidelines for the entirety of the second half, leaving the offense in the hands of drop-back passer Tyler Russel and possibly pigskin-slingin cowboy Dylan Farve.

DEFENSE -
On the defensive side of the ball MSU looks to be relatively consistent with where they were last year. While the Dog's O dropped 52 on Michigan, the D shut down media darling Denard Robinson and the Wolverine offense, allowing only two touchdowns on the game.
The biggest losses are Chris White, KJ Wright and Pernell McPhee, all of whom have taken the next step by joining the ranks of the NFL, so of course I'd like to take this opportunity to offer up my congratulations on outstanding careers as Bulldogs, and wish you all the best in the future.
Luckily with the likes of Chris Hughes, Cam Lawrence, and stand-out transfer Brandon Maye the losses won't sting quite as much. Also, considering the level of competition with Memphis, the backups will figure prominently in finishing out the game on the defensive side of the ball as well.

BOTTOM LINE -
PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER -
Don't take it personally, Memphis, because we've definitely been on the outside looking in before, and not terribly long ago at that, but this will be a rout. That being the case Dan Mullen will have the luxury of seeing much of his depth in action which should allow him to fine-tune his team for the week 2 match up with Auburn. Mullen is also not very likely to tip his hand with a lot of creative plays and misdirection. Look for good old fashion, straight forward, smash mouth football with a lot of running between the tackles and around the ends.

FINAL SCORE -

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 52 - MEMPHIS 0

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 47 - MEMPHIS 10

Let it begin...

2011-08-18T14:01:00.000-07:00

Beginning in two weeks the links and music will return to the House of Hooch, so pull out your cowbell, dust off your tailgating gear and throw your favorite tunes on your iPod (or other listening device) because the party starts Sept. 1st. Until then, here are my predictions for the coming season...

Kick off is two short weeks away, with the MSU Bulldogs opening the 2011 season on the road in Memphis, and it's going to be the longest "two short weeks" ever. The season cannot get here fast enough. I have poured over websites and blogs galore, just to curb my appetite for college football. I've speculated until I'm blue in the face... I've even had dreams about tailgating for a game.

But nothing will compare to the butterflies in my stomach when I wake up on gameday in two weeks... It is a strange feeling, at once calming and exciting. So keeping in mind that I have been drinking deeply from the Maroon and White Kool-aid well, here are my predictions for MSU this season:

Memphis - Starting the season ranked in the top 25 carries heightened expectations, and not the least among them is a convincing victory over Memphis. The Bulldogs should (and will) jump out to an early lead and never look back. Final score: MSU 47 - Memphis 10

Auburn - A tough test in any given season, the week 2 trip to the Plains will be a complete 180 from the cakewalk in Memphis. Cam Newton is gone, but Auburn is still fully loaded at most positions and never an opponent to be taken lightly. However the Bulldogs will dash their hopes at a repeat performance on the national stage in their second game of the season. Final score: MSU 35 - Auburn 24

LSU - The Bulldogs won't have long to bask in the glory of their victory, though, as they must turn around and face the LSU Tigers a mere 5 days later in their home opener of the season. A Thursday night showdown in Starkville will be televised by ESPN, where the Bulldogs will face an LSU team that will likely be sitting at 1-1 after facing off with Oregon in week one, and Northwestern State in week 2. I'll let you guess which one is the W. This will likely be a pivotal game for the Bulldogs' season, as making it through this game unscathed will no doubt catapult MSU into the top 10. Unfortunately the quick turnaround and emotional win over Auburn combined with LSU's athleticism at nearly every position will be the Dawgs' undoing. Final score: MSU 27 - LSU 31

Georgia - Mark Richt and the Eastern Bulldogs will likely be sitting at .500 after opening the season with Boise State and South Carolina, although it's entirely possible they could pull out a win over Boise State. Either way they look to be riding a 2 game win streak coming into this game and will be eager to repay MSU for last season's loss. Dan Mullen will have the Bulldogs ready for business this time around, and though it may get ugly between the Hedges the (Western) Dawgs will come away victorious. Final score: MSU 28 - Georgia 21

UAB - UAB returns their fair share of starters from a team that threatened to sneak up and steal a W from MSU a year ago. It would be easy for the Bulldogs to overlook this game, but these are the situations where coaches earn their keep. Look for Dan Mullen to have the boys in maroon firing on all cylinders by this point. Final score: MSU 42 - UAB 17

South Carolina - The favorite to win an admittedly downtrodden SEC East, SC comes to Starkville likely sporting a perfect record, although early season matchups against Georgia and/or Auburn could put a notch in the L column. Regardless they will still be a national contender and a force to be reckoned with. Garcia at QB and Lattimore running the ball provide a potent offense and the Dawg's D will have their hands full. MSU is lucky enough to host this one at home, and the cowbells will be ringing in celebration of victory at the end of the day. Final score: MSU 27 - SC 24

Kentucky - Riding a high from win over SEC East foe South Carolina, the Bulldogs travel to Lexington to face the Wildcats. This will be a lull in the action by comparison but the Dawgs will handle the Cats handily. Final score: MSU 45 - Kentucky 21

Tennessee-Martin - The homecoming game patsy will show up ready to play, but the Bulldogs can see the light at the end of the tunnel now. Look for the Bulldogs to run up an early lead and play a lot of 2nd and 3rd stringers when it's all said and done. Final score: MSU 42 - TM 13

Alabama - If you've been keeping track you'll know MSU will be sitting at 7-1 coming into what will no doubt be a game that will have repercussions throughout the SEC. The Bulldogs get a couple of lucky breaks in hosting the Crimson Tide at home and facing them after what promises to be a knock-down-drag-out versus LSU the week before. Still, when it's all said and done Bama will out-hustle and out-muscle the Dawgs and hand them their second loss of the season. Final score: MSU 17 - Bama 28

Arkansas - All is not lost, however. The Bulldogs will travel to Little Rock for the penultimate game of the regular season to face the Razorbacks in War Memorial Stadium. Neither team will have forgotten last years double-overtime game that saw the Razorbacks narrowly avoid defeat by a fluke fumble that rolled out the back of the endzone. The Dawgs face a slightly down Arkansas team and pull away late with a win. Final score: MSU 28 - Arkansas 24

Ole Miss - Call it bravado, call it cocky, call it attitude, call it swagger... whatever you call it, call it a W. Ole Miss will be utterly defeated by this point in the season, likely out of the running for any bowl game at all and playing only with the hope of spoiling MSU's season. Dan Mullen will hoist the Egg Bowl Trophy once again, though, and the entire OM campus will be put on suicide watch. Final score: MSU 45 - Ole Miss 23

So there you have it. Call me out if you want, but that's the way I see things shaking down when the dust settles. If your opinion is different I'd love to hear from you, so leave me a comment or email me at houseofhooch@gmail.com and let me know. But honestly, why would you bother when you know I'm right?

Happy Birthday to me...

2011-08-01T12:54:00.001-07:00

You say it's your birthday!

With the beginning of August we have come, at long last, once again, finally, [place successive superlatives here] to the official kickoff of college football. Those of you who were in Starkville a few weeks ago may even have been lucky enough to attend the Running of the Bulldogs along with several fellow maroon-clad Bulldogs and Cowbellions.

It's a special time of year for many (mainly the dudes, although the dudettes have been known to get a little crunk for 'teh foo-baw', too...). On top of being the start of another glorious season of college football, it's also the harbinger of my annual celebration of my entrance into the material plane of existence. The older I get, the less and less birthdays are a big deal for me. However, at the risk of dating myself, let's do the numbers:

At 13 I was officially a teenager. (it mattered to me, ok?)

At 15 I could drive. (it REALLY mattered to me)

At 18 I could drink in Louisiana. (it was a nice perk)

At 21 I could drink anywhere. (it was a nice convenience)

At 25 I got a break in my insurance premiums. (it was just nice)

After that there's not a lot to look forward to. Sorry, AARP, I'm not going all "Giggity" over my 50th, except to say that I'll be happy when I've made it that far and am still kicking (*Matthew McConaughey voice* but have no fear, ladies... there's still a long way to go before that happens, yes there is, yes there is...)

So each day in August, and especially when fall practices start, is like a little birthday magic. I get a juicy tidbit here, an interesting nugget there. It's just enough to keep me going after the Dog Days of Summer's endless onslaught of misery has worn me down so far that I'm reading football blogs that look like a six year old Norwegian kid created them with a Norsk-to-English dictionary and Microsoft Paint.

A quick recap of the Bulldog's 2010 season can be found here. Some of the high points include winning the Egg Bowl for a second straight year, defeating Florida in the Swamp, and laying the beatdown of the century on Michigan in the Gator Bowl. Also of note, MSU was the only team in the entire country to hold Auburn to within 3 points and threaten to win late in the fourth quarter... by the way, Auburn, enjoy that soon to be vacated National Championship complete with your slap on the wrist from the NCAA... *sigh*

So the Bulldogs, riding a high from a resounding win at the Gator Bowl in Jacksonville, FL, rolled into the off-season happy but hungry. As Dan Mullen has preached since his first days on campus, the goal of this team is to represent the SEC West in Atlanta at the SEC Championship Game, and they have yet to accomplish that goal. What stands in the way of that goal this time around? Well, here's the schedule:

Date------------Opponent---------------------Location

Thu, Sep 01-----Memphis----------------------Memphis, TN

Sat, Sep 10-----Auburn *---------------------Auburn, AL

Thu, Sep 15-----LSU *------------------------Starkville

Sat, Sep 24-----Louisiana Tech---------------Starkville

Sat, Oct 01-----Georgia *--------------------Athens, GA

Sat, Oct 08-----UAB--------------------------Birmingham, AL

Sat, Oct 15-----South Carolina *-------------Starkville

Sat, Oct 29-----Kentucky *-------------------Lexington, KY

Sat, Nov 05-----Tennessee Martin [HC]--------Starkville

Sat, Nov 12-----Alabama *--------------------Starkville

Sat, Nov 19-----Arkansas *-------------------Little Rock, AR

Sat, Nov 26-----Ole Miss *-------------------Starkville
*SEC Games
** Sorry for the crappy looking dashes all over the schedule... and screw you, Blogger! I put those spaces in there for a reason!

The Bulldogs, who finished 16th in the nation while sporting what was arguably one of, if not the, toughest schedule in the country, face a murderer's row of opponents this season as well. Facing SEC East favorite South Carolina at home is definitely a bonus, but they also have the problem of facing a scrappy Auburn team on a Thursday night after traveling to LSU just five days prior. As you can see, their work is cut out for them...

I will hold off on making any predictions just yet, as we still have a few weeks before kickoff, but even though the schedule isn't as easy as some, this is quite possibly the most complete Bulldog team MSU will field in 20 years, so there are a lot of expectations.

I had intended to sign off by linking an excellent video created by Derek Cody but some bureaucratic stiff, likely an NCAA or SEC corporate employee, got his panties in a wad and had the video pulled, so the nod goes to a regular poster from the SixPack, sfslickdawg this week... are you "Ready Ready!?" (bonus video re: "ready ready" here.)

And finally, if you are in the Greater Starkville Metropolitan Area this evening come to Dave's Dark Horse Tavern at 7:30 for some free birthday pizza provided by the good folks at Dave's in honor of my aging!

Oh, Sweet Delicious Football...

2011-03-04T12:58:00.000-08:00

Oh, Sweet Delicious Football...

Oh how I have missed thee, even if it's only been 2 months since the Dawgs walked all over Michigan in the Gator Bowl. Now that this clusterfuck of a basketball season has drawn it's final, shuddering breath I can devote them time I spent gnashing my teeth over the partially aborted fetus known as MSU basketball to something worthwhile.

Spring practice is finally under way, and the sweet, velvety embrace of football has wrapped her loving arms around me once again. Sure, it's just spring practice. It's basically the equivalent of a 30 second shoulder rub when you desperately need a full body massage, but it's enough to tide me over for the time being.

Inspiration

2011-02-08T13:00:00.001-08:00

Inspiration. It comes in many forms. It could be found in a statement... a gesture... a look... It's different for everyone, but you know it when you see it.

Carolina Liar - Show Me What I'm Lookin For

Wait, I’m wrong
Should have done better than this
Please, I’ll be strong
I’m finding it hard to resist
So show me what I’m looking for

Save me, I’m lost
Oh Lord, I’ve been waiting for you
I’ll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I’m looking for
Show me what I’m looking for…oh Lord

Don’t let go
I’ve wanted this far too long
Mistakes become regrets
I’ve learned to love abuse
Please show me what I’m looking for

Save me, I’m lost
Oh Lord, I’ve been waiting for you
I’ll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I’m looking for
Show me what I’m looking for…oh Lord

Show me what I’m looking for
Show me what I’m looking for
Show me what I’m looking for

Save me, I’m lost
Oh Lord, I’ve been waiting for you
I’ll pay any cost
Just save me from being confused
Wait, I’m wrong
I can’t do better than this
I’ll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I’m looking for
Show me what I’m looking for
Show me what I’m looking for
Show me what I’m looking for…oh Lord

We've all seen it. The flashes of brilliance. The inklings of raw talent. The moments of clarity, if you will.

But what we are seeing even more are the astounding failures. The miscues. The near-misses. The undisciplined mistakes. The apathy. Oh, the apathy.

I don't know what it will take to get through to this staff and these players. I've screamed at the top of my lungs. I've acted like I don't care (but I do... I really, really do). None of it has seemed to work. So why should this work?

Well, it shouldn't. Not per se, anyway. But that doesn't mean I won't try. Like the man says, "I'll pay any cost, just save me from being confused." Sometimes you just need to break things down until you find a common ground... somewhere to start from, if you'll pardon the hanging preposition.

We are Maroon and White. We are fans. We are players. We are coaches. We are wonderful. We are passionate. We are Bulldogs. And we are hurting.

You've got the talent. You've got the potential. Do you have the desire? Can you show me what I'm lookin for?

Social Media in College Athletics...

2011-02-04T09:40:00.001-08:00

and, more importantly, it's aftermath...

I submit for your approval the following conversations. These conversations took place following two players' outbursts on Twitter, and are therefore expressed in twit-speak (if that's not a word it should be, I mean it works on sooooo many levels).

Stricklin: Rick, wtf?
Stansbury: idk, lol
Stricklin: no lolz, srz bizness
Stansbury: k

Stansbury: Guys... Twitter? wtf?
Ravern/Sidney: idk, lol
Stansbury: no lolz, srz bizness
Ravern/Sidney: lol, wtf?
Stansbury: no more twitter
Ravern/Sidney: *finish last tweet* k

This is, essentially, exactly what happened the other day in the MSU basketball program. The names have not been changed, because no one is innocent here.

Stricklin and/or Stansbury should've banned Twitter/Facebook/Thenextbigthing for the whole of the season the FIRST time there was an outburst. And this isn't even the second time this has happened... it's like the battered wife syndrome. "But he looooooove me!"

Ravern/Sidney should've kept their mouths shut. Even the dumbest players know you don't run off at the mouth and criticize your coach during the season. If you want to transfer, transfer, and save your vitriol for the media outlets in your new home. They will eat it up. Your current fans don't want/need to see it.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Sidney has tremendous upside, but he is a cancer on the attitudes of the other players. Scrunching up your face to feign indignance EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. you don't get a call is beyond immature. As is taunting the crowd when you make one (1), ONE (ONE[1]) good play the entire game. Save your blowing kisses crap for when you're walking out the door, AFTER THE 'W'.

It's time to dangle the carrot (twinkie?) in front of Sidney. Whatever motivational tools Stansbury has used up to now have been proven ineffective. If it takes treating him to a free run at the buffet after a win, so be it. But make his (VERY) fat ass WORK ON THE DEFENSIVE END OF THE FLOOR!

Current reigning theme song: It's a Mistake - Men at Work
Theme songs in waiting: Bittersweet Symphony - the Verve, Haunting Me - Stabbing Westward

Cliche Phrase #27

2011-01-17T09:32:00.000-08:00

"Turning the corner..." "Flashes of brilliance" or some other cliche? What words would you use to describe the about face that the Mississippi State basketball team has pulled in their last 2 games?

First off, let's not start suckin' each others dicks quite yet. We are talking about a couple of wins that don't garner a lot of credit on the surface. Ole Miss is having a fairly mediocre season thus far, and Auburn is just awful. It's still nice to get a win on the road, though, and at the end of the day a win is a win is a win.

That being said, this team has shown the potential to play great basketball. If Sidney continues shaping up physically and they keep getting quality minutes from their bench, the Bulldogs will be a force to be reckoned with come SEC Tourney time. Although their record is abysmal and leaves a deep hole to dig themselves out of, putting together a strong conference resume and making a run to the title game of the SEC Tourney are 2 major factors that will contribute to the Bulldogs getting some consideration come March.

In order to do that, however, Mississippi State must face the murderer's row of teams from the highly touted SEC East. The Bulldogs' next 3 games come against SEC East foes Georgia, Florida and Vandy. To keep their hopes alive they need to take 2 out of 3, if not the whole enchilada. Quite the tall task, and it remains to be seen if these Dawgs can go on the road to a hostile environment like Georgia and take care of business. The win at OM was good, but Georgia beat Ole Miss as badly as State beat Auburn, so they have their work cut out for them.

I was 2 out of 3 for my picks on the last three games, however with my current predictions of the Bulldogs losing the next 3 I wouldn't mind going oh-fer in the short term...

Theme Songs in Waiting: Coldplay - Viva la Vida, Men at Work - It's a Mistake

We have a lot to discuss...

2011-01-06T12:46:00.001-08:00

And I'm going to fly through the DAMN TALKING POINTS as quickly and efficiently as I can:

First off a big ole HOOOUUUAAAHHH!!! to the Mississippi State Bulldogs and Coach Dan Mullen for handing Michigan (winningest program in NCAA history) their worst bowl game loss in the program's history. Keep up the good work, Dawgs!

Now, the bad: Basketball.

Elgin "the Amputee" Bailey and Renardo "New Jack" Sidney come to blows in Hawaii.

Sidney is suspended from playing yet aGAIN (what ever happened to three strikes and you're out?).

Baily and Sidney are sent home from Hawaii and the rest of the road trip.

Rick "I recruit, they shoot" Stansbury waffles harder than a weak-willed fat kid in a candy store, and finally acquiesces to the "talent" he's been chasing and lobbying for over the last year and a half, leading to Elgin "Teddy Bear" Baily requesting a transfer.

Sidney is reinstated, cementing his importance in his own mind.

Twanny "Who?" Beckham is disgusted by the state of the program and sees his playing time greatly diminished with the return of Dee "I need a new watch" Bost, and also requests a transfer.

MSU basketball is 8-6 against a pretty weak OOC schedule (RPI somewhere in the 200's?) and now turns it's focus to the murderer's row known as the SEC.

Can Renardo "All me, all the time" Sidney and Dee "Damn a deadline" Bost change the complexion of this squad and have them in contention for a spot in the big dance come March? No.

That's right I said it.

Some experts have indicated that it will take an SEC west team such as MSU having 12+ conference wins in order to make the dance. Do I think these dawgs can pull together and win 12 of the next 16 games?

Absolutely not... and ultimately it all falls on Rick "X's and O's are for tic-tac-toes" Stansbury's shoulders.

He recruited the "players"(pronounced: prima-donas) and has "coached" them (the word "coached" is in quotation marks because any coach that can't find time to practice the fucking ZONE DEFENSE somewhere along the way BEFORE the season starts isn't doing their damn job, now are they?) to be what they are today. A bunch of individuals who are more concerned with their playing time and their potential NBA futures (pipe dreams) than representing their school and their fans.

Renardo "Double Stuff" Sidney clearly possesses some talent or he wouldn't have been so highly recruited by USC, UCLA and the scores of other schools, but he is literally getting too big for his britches (that's "bRitches", Sid... with an "R"... fatty). He will not magically be in "game shape" this Saturday after bellying up to the buffet twice a week for the last 2 years. He will pant and puff and wheeze and huff, he will quit on plays, and he will walk (not run) down the floor, likely on his 3rd or 4th possession of the game. He will do all this and more (less?) because he is already a star in his own mind, and people like Rick "the Kingmaker" Stansbury feed into that by letting him get away with murder...

Ok so it's not murder, but he did beat the shit outta Elgin.

Still, they are my dawgs and I will cheer them on and hope like hell I end up eating crow in march... I like mine with hot sauce.

Go Dawgs!

A quick look ahead with my predictions...I expect MSU to jump out to a 3-0 start in conference play, followed by a hideous 3 game skid against SEC east teams.

MSU v Bama -MSU wins by 5
MSU v OM -MSU wins by 2
MSU v Auburn -MSU wins by 4
MSU v GA -GA wins by 2
MSU v Vandy -Vandy wins by 6
MSU v Florida -Fla wins by 8

P.S. - In case you're a regular reader and wondering, this basketball team doesn't get theme music until I feel they deserve it.... good or bad.

The morning aftermath, Alabama State

2010-12-15T09:31:00.000-08:00

Ravern Johnson was suspended for the game last night due to missing classes, but ultimately it didn't matter. The Bulldogs pulled out a win in classically sloppy style over Alabama State. The Bulldogs looked slow, lazy, and sloppy but there were some bright spots. Riley Benock seems to finally be coming out of his shell and has improved his offense. Elgin Bailey is looking better and better, and freshman Shaun Smith played well except for a few freshman mistakes.

Tonight marks the (hopefully) triumphant debut of Renardo Sidney on the hardwood. I expect Rick Stansbury to play Sidney 18-20 minutes to see what kind of "game-shape" he's in before heading to the Bahamas this weekend to take on Virginia Tech. Rumor has it that Rick and Renardo have been doing the P90X workout together for several weeks, which, if true, is good news for MSU fans who have expressed some concern about Sidney's weight and conditioning. Just a few short hours and this young man will finally be able to play again after an almost 2 year suspension by the NCAA for what they deemed as "lying to the NCAA." Insert sarcastic comment about Cam and Cecil Newton here.

Good luck, Bulldogs... make us proud, and GO DAWGS!

It's still football season, right?

2010-12-14T07:52:00.000-08:00

As the MSU football teams preps for their visit to Jacksonville, FL for the 2011 Gator Bowl, the basketball team is already seven games into their season.

The Basketball Dawgs are now sitting at 5-2 after the first seven games. There are a couple of bad losses to Florida Atlantic and East Tennessee State that are going to hurt the Bulldog's chances come tournament time, so the Dawgs are hoping to find some production from their role-players until the duo of Dee Bost and Renardo Sidney return to the hardwood.

Dee Bost missed the NBA Draft withdrawal deadline by approximately 24 hours, causing the NCAA to suspend him for nine games. Renardo Sidney was the much maligned transfer student who was accused (but never proven) to receive improper benefits and the NCAA SUSPECTS that he lied, so he sat out an entire season plus sitting a third of this season as well. And for those of you keeping track, Cam Newton's dad asked for $200,000 for his son to play football at Auburn "without his knowledge"* which resulted in him being suspended between the hours of 9 pm and 9 am for one day, I guess, if he, sorta, you know, felt like being suspended, or whatever....

* - UTTER. BULLSHIT.

Anyway, the NCAA in it's infinite wisdom makes these decisions on a case-by-case basis, and CLEARLY it's always with the student-athlete's best interests at heart, but I digress.

The Basketball Dawgs are in the midst of a 5-games-in-5-days stretch. Having dropped the first of the five to East Tennessee St. the Bulldogs rebounded (get it? a little basketball humor for you there) with 2 straight wins over North Carolina A&T and a scrappy Nicholls State team that beat SEC West foe LSU on their home court earlier this season.

Conventional wisdom dictates that SEC teams shouldn't lose to "lesser foes" like Florida Atlantic, but it seems every season Rick Stansbury and the Basketball Bulldogs leave fans scratching their heads at the odd loss here or there. Hopefully when the Dynamic Duo of Bost and Sidney return (which one should be Batman, anyway?) the offensive production will pick up, and the outlook will become more palatable. For now, we have to look to players like Rayvern Johnson and Kodi Augustus to step in and produce until we get our full lineup back. Hang in there, Dawgs... January will be here before you know it.

Credentials applied for...

2010-12-08T10:40:00.000-08:00

Please excuse the hanging preposition in the title...

The House of Hooch has applied for media credentials for the 2011 Gator Bowl in Jacksonville, FL! Hopefully the reviewing committee considers my publication as valid as all of my loyal readers. Whatever the case, I make you this sincere promise, avid reader... I will have the best game-day sideline coverage of any MSU sports blog, period!

Either way, House of Hooch will be on hand for the Gator Bowl, so things are bound to get interesting!

Are You Fucking Kidding Me?!

2010-12-01T15:15:00.000-08:00

Cam Newton was ruled ineligible by Auburn yesterday in a landmark announcement that approximately 3 people heard. However today, approximately 24 hours of this announcement, the NCAA has ruled that Cam is eligible, and here is the reason:

Because Cecil Newton (Cam's father) solicited the money without Cam's knowledge.

That's it. That's the claim. That's the exception to the rule. That's the difference between sitting out 24 hours and sitting out a full season plus 1/3 of the next season. Renardo Sidney, you and your family should file a lawsuit against the NCAA right-fucking-now, because you, sir, were robbed.

The Good 'Ol Boy network (translation: SEC) has been getting away with murder for far too long. I'm to the point now that even if some of the fallout negatively affects my beloved alma mater I want all of their dirty dealings to come to light so they can be held accountable for the shit they've been pulling all these years.

It's a sad day when I wish that my conference would suffer a catastrophic meltdown that would shake the very pillars that form its foundation. But that's what I want right now... I want to see this blow up in Auburn and the SEC's collective faces. This is complete and utter bullshit, and the only people who are saying otherwise are either Auburn fans or just plain don't give a shit.

Where is Everybody?**

2010-11-23T15:37:00.000-08:00

**the notation is because this is all I had at the time of kickoff. My intent was to mock the lack of attendance for OM this season, and then say we would beat them by 6.5 points (1 TD). however to be fair that is now hind site, and anything that follows this is all that was said before kickoff. such is the speed of the internet.

____________________________________________________________________________

This week's song is a dedication to the Ole Miss Rebel Bears Country Jamboree and Petting Zoo fan-base and/or stadium. Take your pick, there won't be anyone there to argue.

Where is Everybody? - NIN

did you happen to catch
or did it happen so fast
what you thought would always last
has passed you by
is everything speeding up
or am I slowing down
I'm just spinning around
and I don't know why
all the pieces don't fit
but I really didn't give a shit
never wanted to be like you
but for all I aspire
I am really a liar
and I'm running out of things I can do...

I'd like to stay
but every day
everything pushes me further away
if you could show
help me to know
how it's supposed to be
where did it go?

pleading and
needing and
bleeding and
breeding and
feeding
exceeding
where is everybody?
trying and lying
defying denying
crying and dying
where is everybody?

well okay, enough,
you've had your fun
but come on thare has to be someone
that hasn't yet become
so numb and succumb
and god damn I am so tired of pretending
of wishing I was ending
when all I'm really doing is trying to hide
and keep it inside
and fill it with lies
open my eyes?
maybe I wish I could try

pleading and needing
and bleeding and breeding
feeding exceeding
where is everybody?
trying and lying
defying denying
crying and dying
where is everybody?

Bouncin' Back...

2010-11-17T10:40:00.001-08:00

Well if you read the blog last week you'll know I called for MSU to beat Bama, but as it turns out my stipulation regarding turnovers was dead on. Unfortunately we were on the losing end of that particular statistic, and the rest, as they say, is history...

As a matter of fact, that's exactly the way the Bulldogs should look at it. It's history. We've got to move on because there's still games left to be played, and both of the remaining games have implications on where the Dawgs land in the college football bowl landscape.

At this time of year the swirl of rumors and speculations has reached category 1 hurricane levels. There is much supposition of which team will go where, who will get snubbed by this bowl, etc. I've personally seen predictions for MSU's bowl appearance ranging from Independence and Motor City all the way to Peach and Cotton. Of course our coaches and players can't focus on all this 'hooey' if they want to keep winning football games, so the theme for this week is Bouncing Back... and so it gives me great pleasure to segue this spiel towards a great band and close personal friends of mine, Young Agent Jones.

Oh Yeah - Young Agent Jones

Oh, yeah...

You lose a lot of drive
Thinking everything is fine
But the road will rise up to meet you
And you'll remember you love to drive.
Sure there's a lot of love lost between you
And who you used to be
But you can't think long about it
Since you both think differently.
If you're living inside a bubble
At least you're squeaky clean.
Bubble pop, clock stop, bottom drop
Here's a powerful dose of reality.

Oh, yeah...Welcome back
Oh, yeah...This is living
Oh, yeah...It's coming back
Oh, yeah...

I can think I can speak
I can move I can breathe
Can't believe I didn't lose my mind.
Finally a mission a chance to make decisions
Cheesy lyrics out of my mouth.
I'm worth more to myself than anybody else.
Gotta drill this stuff into my head.
Bouncing back from being useless
To absolutely ruthless.
Coming out as hard as I can!

Oh, yeah...

I could go on for days
About this life-changing moment
That woke my head up.
So I am driven
I know I'm a normal ordinary guy
But I've gotta do something
I've gotta do something...

So watch out you suckers
Watch out, I'm coming.
Watch out you suckers
'Cause now I remember!

It's time for the Bulldogs to "Bounce back from being useless to absolutely ruthless" and come out as hard as they can against Arkansas. It will take nothing short of MSU's best effort to walk away with a 'W' this week.

KEYS TO THE GAME -
OFFENSE - The Bulldogs took their lumps in Alabama, and I don't believe "flat" to be an accurate and expressive enough word to describe the MSU offense in that particular outing. You can trot out all the excuses you want, but in the end MSU did not execute anywhere near their level of skill, and the result was a big Bama lead early that was insurmountable.
The Bulldogs catch a break regarding what they'll be facing this week, though. If Alabama's defense is Asiago, then Arkansas' D is Swiss. That's right, I just made a cheese analogy. Be that as it may, Mississippi State will still need to see significant improvement in the passing game or Arkansas' swiss-cheese-deez is still going to load the box and try to stuff the run. Relf must make Arkansas respect the passing threat, which is a tall task givin what we've seen this season.

DEFENSE - The MSU defense should be able to hold serve in the run game, as they've proven throughout the season. The problem is Arkansas isn't going to line up and try to jam it down your throat (obligatory "That's what she said!"). Ryan Mallet will dissect the Bulldog secondary like a master surgeon unless he is pressured early and often. The MSU DB's will have to play lights out to keep the Dawgs in this one, and even so you can expect the Hogs to break at least 2 big (60 yd+) plays which could result in TD's, if not more. Manny Diaz will have to be creative to find ways to bring pressure on Mallet and still have adequate coverage on the Hog receivers.

BOTTOM LINE -
BIG PLAYS - As I said, even if the Bulldogs play their best game, you're not going to stop a passer like Mallet 100% of the time. Limiting big plays is key to hanging in there and being in a position to win late in the game. Likewise, MSU will need some position players to step up and make significant contributions on the offensive side of the ball. So if you're asking what MSU needs to win this game... in a word? Heart.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 41 ARK 38

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 27 ARK 24

Yes, I'm doing it again. I guess it's Dan Mullen's fault for "bringing the swagger back" to MSU. I feel confident that the Bulldogs can line up and be competitive with any opponent they face, and that is a crucial and often overlooked element to any successful program. And before you get in tither, even if we lose to Ark this weekend you can be damn sure I'll be calling for a win in the Egg Bowl next week, too. Hell I've got to be right at least once... right?

Sometimes I Hate Being Right

2010-11-15T09:47:00.001-08:00

I hate it when I'm right... I said last week that for MSU to win against Bama they had to create turnovers and turn those into points. In fact they did the exact opposite, so instead of a close game coming down to the final minutes we had a blowout.

The MSU offense made some plays when needed, but only on the ground. Chris Relf, who supposedly spent much of the open week working on his passing game, looked helpless throwing the ball.

The last two games of the season are winnable. But for the Dawgs to beat Arkansas this weekend they must push the pass defense into overdrive. Ryan Mallet will systematically pick apart the Bulldog secondary if you give him just a little time. A win against Ark would give a major boost to the Dawgs bowl stock. We will see... we will see.

Stranger Danger!

2010-11-12T11:12:00.000-08:00

We've got a lot to cover this week, so let's get to it... right after you watch this.

Good stuff, huh? Mad props go out to Derek Cody (@derekcody on twitter) for this and the rest of his videos we've linked in the blog this season. Great work, Derek!

This week's dedication goes out to, well, a lot of folks. It's dedicated to both Alabama and Mississippi State, since pretty much no one predicted that they'd be "wearing" identical 7-2 records going into this week's game. It's also dedicated to Auburn, Cam & Cecil Newton, Kenny Rogers, John Bond and a whole slew of others, because their collective cloak and dagger routine has the entire nation wondering just what the hell is REALLY going on?

So without further ado...

The Stranger - Billy Joel

Well we all have a face
That we hide away forever
And we take them out and
Show ourselves
When everyone has gone.
Some are satin some are steel
Some are silk and some are leather
They're the faces of the stranger
But we love to try them on.

Well we all fall in love
But we disregard the danger.
Though we share so many secrets
There are some we never tell.
Why were you so surprised
That you never saw the stranger?
Did you ever let your lover see
The stranger in yourself?

Don't be afraid to try again
Everyone goes south
Every now and then.
You've done it, why can't
Someone else?
You should know by now
You've been there yourself.

There's a lot of meaning to be gleaned from those lyrics if one so chooses.

First, let's get the Rented Mule Saga out of the way. The timeline goes a little something like this (note: This information has been gathered from various message boards and blogs around the internet, so it is most likely 100% factual. However, we reserve the right to change/edit/update/remove this information as we see fit in light of any new information that comes to bear after the writing of this entry. If you have a question about our sources then learn2internet.):

1) Cam Newton is born.
2) Cecil Newton watches his mule, er, son grow into a talented football player and dollar signs roll up in his eyes like a damn cartoon.
3) Cam first goes to Florida, where he cheats his ass off and steals a laptop. He is dismissed from Florida.
4) Cam goes to JuCo.
5) Papa Cecil decides to cash in (possibly for a second time if he pulled this off at Florida?) on his son's new-found "free agency."
6) Papa Cecil skips his seminar on "how to subtly ask for money from college athletics 101".
7) Papa Cecil shops his mule, er, son around to various SEC schools.
8) Kenny Rogers tries to wedge his fat ass into the middle of this situation to make some bread by calling former teammates and soliciting funds.
9) John Bond rides in on a white horse like Sir Gallahad and blows the whistle on Papa Cecil, and, by extension, all the other dirty motherfuckers involved, by reporting the solicitation to MSU, who in turn reports it to the SEC as per Mike Slive's mandate.
10) Mike Slive does his best to brush this gigantic steaming pile of elephant dung under the proverbial carpet.
11) Rumors and allegations swirl between Dec. 2009 and July 2010.
12) More information comes to light in July and the NCAA steps in.
13) Thanks to the glory that is the Information Age all this evidence is hinted at and pussy-footed around all over the internet for weeks at a time, driving ratings and web page views through the roof.
14) Auburn claims no knowledge of any wrong doing throughout the entire process.
15) Auburn decides to sit Cam Newton for the Georgia game, just in case.
16) All across Alabama frantic 911 calls take place as Auburn's fans' heads explode, leaving family and friends to pick up bits of brain, skull, and other fucked up, repugnant shit.

Get all that? Good, now on to our game...

MSU faces Alabama in Tuscaloosa this Saturday night in what is an unexpected meeting between two 7-2 SEC West teams. Mississippi State is riding high on the crest of a six-game winning streak, whereas Bama limps into the game licking their wounds after the luckiest son of a bitch alive pulls another rabbit out of his gr-ass.

KEYS TO THE GAME -
OFFENSE - For Mississippi State to have a chance at winning this game, they must not only establish a serviceable (if not strong) running game, but they must also present a legitimate passing threat to keep one of the best defenses in the nation from loading the box and crushing hearts, skulls and dreams. Dan Mullen was quoted as saying that Chris Relf spent considerable time in the off-week working on his passing game, and hopefully something good will come of that.

DEFENSE - MSU caught several breaks this season in the form of key players being out, whether by injury or suspension. AJ Green was held out against Georgia. Demps did not play at Florida. Case Keenum was out for Houston. The list goes on, indeed, because Trent Richardson is questionable for this weekend's game against the Bulldogs. Even so the Dawgs must prepare for a solid ground game as Mark Ingram, who won the first ever Heisman for Alabama last season, will still be a factor. MSU has been successful stopping the run for most of the season, but Greg McElroy will test the Dawgs through the air, as well. The defense must create at least 2 turnovers that the Bulldogs turn into points on the board to get this game in hand.

BOTTOM LINE -
TURNOVERS - Since the LSU game, when MSU had 5 turnovers, the Bulldogs have done a good job of taking care of the ball. They need to take it one step further this weekend, and not only protect the rock, but find ways to steal it from Bama in order to lock this game down. If the Bulldogs end up with a negative turnover ratio in this game it's as good as gone.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 30 BAMA 27

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 17 BAMA 14

Yes, you heard me. I am calling an MSU win in Tuscaloosa this weekend. The Tide have little to play for now that they are officially out of the National Championship picture, and their tanks are close to 'E' after the emotional loss last week. MSU is coming of a bye week, and although it was very emotional with the loss of Nick Bell, the Bulldogs have dedicated the rest of the season to Nick, and you can bet they will go hard every single play in his honor.

Here's to you, Nick. Only the Good Die Young.

In Memoriam

2010-11-03T12:58:00.000-07:00

Nick Bell - #36

I express myself through music a lot. Sometimes it reflects what's inside me trying to get out, sometimes it's a reaction to the world around me, and sometimes it reflects the state of mind I am trying to attain. Rather than make a fumbling attempt at writing a eulogy for someone I didn't have the honor of knowing personally, I am going to link some songs and excerpts from the lyrics that have meaning for me in all of this. Take from it what you will.

The Bulldogs lost a dear friend on Tuesday. A brother, a son, a friend, a warrior, and a role model. Nick Bell did not deserve to lose his life so early. This blog is dedicated to the loving memory of a Bulldog taken from us too soon. You will not be forgotten Nick. Not now, not ever.

Angel - Sarah McLachlan

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here.
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear.
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie.
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there...

Change - Blind Melon

And as we all play parts of tomorrow,
Some ways will work and other ways we’ll play
But I know we all can’t stay here forever,
So I want to write my words on the face of today... and then they’ll paint it.

It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday - Boyz II Men

How do I say goodbye to what we had?
The good times that made us laugh
Outweigh the bad.

I thought we'd get to see forever
But forever's gone away
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.

Brothers in Arms - Dire Straits

Now the sun's gone to hell
And the moon's riding high.
Let me bid you farewell,
Every man has to die.
But it's written in the starlight
And every line on your palm.
We're fools to make war,
On our brothers in arms.

Lightning Crashes - Live

Lightning crashes, an old mother dies.
Her intentions fall to the floor,
The angel closes her eyes.
The confusion that was hers,
Belongs now, to the baby down the hall.

Say Hello 2 Heaven - Temple of the Dog

I, I never wanted
To write these words down for you
With the pages of phrases
Of things we'll never do.

Hey, so I blow out, out the candle and I put you to bed,
Since you can't say to me now
How the dog broke your bone.
There's just one thing left to be said,

Say, "Hello to heaven, to heaven, yeah"
Say, "Hello to heaven, to heaven, yeah"
Say, "Hello to heaven, to heaven, yeah"
Say, "Hello to heaven, to heaven, yeah"

Just a Phase...

2010-10-28T14:35:00.000-07:00

Hello. Welcome. Watch this and then come back...

Outstanding work, no? Now then... Congratulations are in order as the Bulldogs managed to pull their collective act together and come away from a potential let-down game with a W. UAB proved to be almost more than MSU could handle, but the Bulldogs came away with a win thanks to some really solid work in the kicking game.

This week is special, not just because the Bulldogs are 6-2 in October and bowl eligible with 4 games left to improve their bowl stock, but because it's also Halloween! This is probably my favorite holiday... it started when I was a kid ("Wait... everyone we know is just GIVING AWAY CANDY?!") but now it's more about dressing up as someone completely different, or not even real, and stepping outside yourself for a night. People tend to relax a little more, let their guard down, and just generally have a good time.

So in honor of Halloween and all the ZombieDawgs that will be at the game this weekend, this week's song is...

BREAKING BENJAMIN - PHASE

Out of the ground I rise to grace.
Nobody knows it's just a phase.
Help me I'm out of breath again,
Nobody knows somewhere to make it go away...

It's just a phase,
And I can't wait...
Phase,
Phase,
Phase,
Phase.
I know, I know, I know...
iI's just a fucking phase!

IM DRAINED TIME TO FAKE AND DELAY!
WATCH THE PENNY DROP,
LET IT GO UP AND IN DROP,
THEN WATCH IT ROLL LET’S
ALL MOURN TILL I SURVIVE INSIDE YOU!

The opponent this week is a surly Kentucky Wildcats team that knocked off a talented South Carolina team a week after they defeated #1 Alabama. The 'Cats are sitting at 4-4 (1-4) and look to grab a much needed win to keep heading towards bowl eligibility. If the Bulldogs want to win this one they will need to stay focused for the entire game, because these 'Cats have some talents that could surprise you. That wasn't one of them, though...

KEYS TO THE GAME -
OFFENSE - Part of the Bulldogs' lack-luster performance last week can be attributed to missing some key players. Center J.C. Brignone missed the first half, while top RB Vick Ballard was held out of the entire game due to a sprained ankle sustained the week before. In Ballard's absence LaDarius Perkins pulled the majority of the running duties and performed admirably. Derek DePasquale's five field goals in last week's win over UAB gives MSU some confidence in their kicking game, as well.
Most, if not all, of the missing players last week will return to see playing time this week, so the key here is execution. Kentucky's running defense is weak to say the least, so look for MSU to pound the ball early and often.

DEFENSE - The offensive threat from Kentucky will mostly be in the air this week, especially with news that top Wildcats running back Derrick Locke will not make the trip this weekend due to a nagging shoulder injury. The problem is if the Bulldogs are susceptible to an offensive attack, it's through the air. The UAB QB lit the MSU secondary up pretty much all night. Our secondary must be up to the challenge if they want to keep the game in hand.

BOTTOM LINE -
On paper it looks like a fairly favorable match-up, but will the Bulldogs remain focused now that they know they're bowl-bound? A slip up here, loss of concentration there, and there could be some unhappy Dogs in Starkville. MSU must stay focused, and continue their outstanding streak of not turning the ball over to win this battle.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 41 UK 21

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 28 UK 24

Keep on Rollin'

2010-10-20T12:49:00.000-07:00

Congratulations are in order... The Bulldogs of Mississippi State University are ranked #24 in both the AP and Coaches polls for the first time in just under a decade. If you remember my pre-game blog for the Florida game last week, you'll see I gave the Bulldogs a fighting chance to come away with the win, which they did.

Now comes relatively unknown territory for MSU, as they are in the midst of their longest winning streak since 1999. This calls for some special attention from the coaches in order to keep the players' heads on straight. To take a page from Vince Lombardi, we need to act like we've been here before. So with that in mind, Mississippi State needs to keep on rollin' and keep up the momentum.

REO Speedwagon - Roll With the Changes

I knew it had to happen
Felt the tables turning
Got me through my darkest hour

I heard the thunder clapping
Felt the desert burning
Until you poured on me
Like a sweet sun-shower

So if you`re tired
Of the same old story
Oh, turn some pages
I`ll be here when you are ready
To roll with the changes
Ohhhhh, yeah....

The now 5-2 Bulldogs are playing for the opportunity to become bowl-eligible in October, which is a great feeling for the coaches, players and fans. But if ever there was a trap game, it's... NEXT WEEK! I'm serious, I just can't imagine Dan Mullen letting these Dawgs get so lazy that a team like UAB sneaks up and takes one from them. We will leave that to the Ole Miss Rebel Black Bears Country Jamboree and Petting Zoo's of the world. That being said, let's take a look at it anyway...

KEYS TO THE GAME -
OFFENSE - Facing the final non-conference opponent of the season the Bulldogs will likely look to jump out to an early lead, which would allow Dan Mullen to sub in several second and third string players. The benefits are two-fold. First off taking our starting lineup out of the game early keeps them from being injured and keeps them fresh for the upcoming games. Furthermore, the extra game-time snaps give much needed experience to the players in backup positions.
If MSU jumps out to a solid lead in the first half don't be surprised to see Tyler Russell in mop-up duty for much of the game. Russell needs these reps to become further acclimated to the speed of the game at the college level, as he will likely be the projected starter at QB next season.

DEFENSE - For the defense, Manny Diaz will probably not show a lot that we haven't seen yet. That's not to say the defense won't be blitzing a healthy amount of the time, but Diaz and Wilson will likely be rotating a lot of guys out on the Defensive side of the ball as well, so their main focus here will be getting game reps to backup players.
The defensive line has been more than satisfactory during this four game win streak, and the secondary has done their share as well. Any time you rotate newer players into the mix you will have some mistakes. The key for these young guys is to bounce back and make the stops.

BOTTOM LINE -
KEEP ON ROLLIN' - Mississippi State will become bowl eligible with a win this weekend. After that they face a Kentucky team on Halloween Eve that has been hot and cold this season. A win there and the Bulldogs will have a 6 game win streak and improve their bowl stock with each successive win. The end of the season is never easy, with games against Alabama, Arkansas and Ole Miss yet to come. When common sense dictates that the Bama and Arkansas games could very well be losses, racking up as many W's as possible is key to landing a desirable bowl berth.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 47 UAB 13

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 35 UAB 14

Know Your Enemy

2010-10-14T15:17:00.000-07:00

The Bulldogs did what was expected of them last Saturday with a solid win over a depleted Houston team. That win gave MSU it's first 3-game win streak since 2007... Meanwhile the upcoming Gators are experiencing some history of their own, but not the good kind, like you want. It seems Florida has lost back-to-back games for the first time since... 2007. So this match-up has some big-time implications for both schools.

Much has been made of the fact that Dan Mullen was the offensive coordinator for Florida during the 06 and 08 National Championship seasons. Mullen knows Urban Meyer and the much maligned Steve Addazio, who has replaced Mullen as OC for the Gators. Now obviously that works both ways, as the Florida staff is familiar with Mullen as well, but the bottom line is this knowledge could provide advantages to whomever makes the most of it... and so I give you:

Know Your Enemy

Hey yo, and get with this...uggh!
Word is born
Fight the war, fuck the norm
Now I got no patience
So sick of complacence
With the D the E the F the I the A the N the C the E
Mind of a revolutionary
So clear the lane
The finger to the land of the chains
What?
The land of the free?
Whoever told you that is your enemy

Now something must be done
About vengeance, a badge and a gun
So rip the mike, rip the stage, rip the system
I was born to rage against 'em

Now action must be taken!
We don't need the key,
We'll break in!

I've got no patience now,
So sick of complacence now.
I've got no patience now,
So sick of complacence now.
Sick of sick of sick of sick of you...
Time has come to pay...
Know your enemy!

Somewhere Zach de la Rocha's skin is crawling as I redefine his lyrics to describe college football instead of political revolution. So be it.

The Bulldogs enter this game in good position to keep their hopes of a bowl game alive, sitting at 4-2 on the season with 6 games left to play. Of those six, three are widely considered winnable, namely UAB, Kentucky and The Ole Miss Rebel Black Bears Jamboree and Petting Zoo.

That leaves games against Florida, Alabama and Arkansas, three perennial powerhouses of recent history in the SEC. Of these three, Florida looks to be the most winnable, and even beating a "bad" Florida team will improve post-season bowl stock for the Bulldogs.

KEYS TO THE GAME -
OFFENSE - The MSU offense appears to be firing on all cylinders after a rough start to the season. Chris Relf has improved his passing, leading to fewer INT's, and appears to have rediscovered his ability to run the ball when plays and pockets collapse. The key here is to continue the accuracy in the passing game. Florida's secondary is very talented and highly athletic, and sloppy passing is an open invitation to the pick-6 party.
Vick Ballard and the O-line will try to establish the running game, and have done so quite well in recent weeks, albeit against non-SEC competition. They must continue to refine their ground game and bust Florida in the chops in order to open up enough room for the passing game.

DEFENSE - Manny Diaz has the defense performing admirably, but that won't be enough to keep the Gators off the scoreboard this weekend. Even a Florida team sans Tebow and Harvin is still a legitimate scoring threat, and they are very fast at every position. It will be up to Diaz and the D to keep their heads on straight and focus on every play... go to sleep on one play and you'll wake up with a Gator in the end-zone.
John Brantley has been serviceable as a QB, however during the LSU game last week I noticed he spent an inordinant amount of time in the pocket on several plays, many of which resulted in lost yardage, lost downs or lost footballs. MSU will be blitzing from all sides, trying to get to Brantley and pressure him into making poor decisions with the ball.

BOTTOM LINE -
QB PRESSURE - Getting to Brantley is the key to winning this game. In the seconds or even milliseconds it takes for Brantley to recognize where the pressure is coming from, make a decision and move the ball the MSU secondary must lock down his options down the field. Show him a wall of Maroon and the Bulldogs have a fighting chance to saunter out of the Swamp winners. Show him swiss cheese and watch him shred it all day long.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 27 UF 21

REALISTIC PREDICITON -
MSU 17 UF 27

The Spotlight is On...

2010-10-08T11:50:00.000-07:00

The Bulldogs take on the Houston Cougars this Saturday, and it's fair to say the spotlight is on this game. The game has big implications on both sides of the ball, as Houston looks to defend the fourth longest home-winning-streak in the NCAA at 18 wins, and the Bulldogs look to grab a win that would have a definite impact on their hopes for a post-season game in Dec/Jan.

So yes, The Spotlight is On...

You know the one thing you're fighting to hold,
Will be the one thing you've got to let go.
And when you feel the wall cannot be burned,
You're gonna die to try what can't be done.
Gonna say stay out but you don't care.
Now is there nothing like that inside of you anywhere?

Oh just take the fall...
You're one of us.
The spotlight is on!

As I mentioned last week, MSU can ill afford to give up a game during this stretch if they intend to go Bowling for Dollars this year. This game has been circled on the calendar since some suspicious officiating and costly turnovers lost the game for the Bulldogs last year. At the start of the season this looked to be a great 'acid test' for MSU facing off against Case Keenum and the high-powered Houston offense. But unfortunately for the Cougars both Keenum and their 2nd string QB Cotton Turner were injured against the Bruins earlier in the season, leaving Houston to start their true freshman QB Terrance Broadway. And the hits just keep on comin', as Houston also loses top receiver James Clevleand for "a violation of team rules." (don't you just love obscure sports-speak? reminds me of Press-Hop...)

MSU looks to be relatively healthy on both sides of the ball this week with the exception of Nick Bell (brain mass, removed) and Marcus Green (torn ACL). Expect the Bulldogs to keep their fingers crossed, knock on wood, and maybe sacrifice a live chicken or two to keep the winning streak alive.

KEYS TO THE GAME -

OFFENSE -
Mississippi State must move the chains and take care of the ball. Simple and straight forward, nothing fancy needed to walk away with the win here. Limit turnovers and get some consistent production from Relf (or Russell, if you're feeling lucky, Dan) and the O-line. Relf should be able to tuck the ball and run to pick up a few first downs if the pocket collapses, and if he can connect on a deep ball or two to keep the D honest then things will be going the Bulldogs' way. It also wouldn't hurt if Ballard broke a run or two like Dixon did last season.

DEFENSE -
Control the corners! MSU has done an admirable job of stopping the run this season, especially up the middle, but they are soft around the edges. The Bulldogs must tighten down on the ends and hold their own in the secondary if they are to control the flow of this game. Are Keenum and Cleveland big losses for Houston's offense? Sure. Does that mean the Houston won't be able to move the ball? Don't count on it. Bryce Beall will carry a large portion of the load, and he is a quality running back. If MSU cannot lock down the edges Beall could break for a couple of game-changing runs.

BOTTOM LINE -
EXECUTION. No, not that kind of execution, the kind that allows MSU to move the chains and hang on to the ball. Relf cannot loft airy passes out over the center of the field. Ballard, Perkins, et al must hold on to the football. The O and D lines must make all of their assignments properly. Do these things and MSU walks away winning handily. Fail to execute at key times and the Bulldogs will drop a costly win to an out-of-conference team and make their up-hill climb to the postseason that much more difficult. The spotlight is on!

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 45 UH 27

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 30 UH 27

The Day After: Alcorn

2010-10-05T14:14:00.001-07:00

So there's not much to say here, since I did not have the benefit of recording the game Saturday (thanks Fox, you money-grubbing whores). However good friend and contributor to the House of Hooch, KOMSCUBFAN, has informed me I can catch a replay on CSS tomorrow, so I may say "I was wrong...this changes everything" but let's be honest, that's not likely to happen, now is it?

The general consensus is that we did what we were expected to do, and I agree with that to some extent. We won handily, and I don't think any but the most paranoid of fans in the stadium ever thought we were in danger of losing. We tried to give Tyler Russell of few reps, and although he connected with a couple of 20+ yard passes his performance was, on the whole, not impressive. Granted he's a red-shirt freshman and he will improve with time, but he's not as physical of shifty as Relf, so when the pocket collapses he's not going to pick up as many yards with his feet.

My disappointment in the defense really stems from vanity. I WANTED a shutout. I predicted 7-10 points. We gave them 16. A lot of credit goes to Alcorn's QB Brandon Bridge, who broke a 78 yard run on the Bulldog's D. I believe I "suggested" that Relf should be taking notes directly following that play. I will say Relf has gotten better as the season has progressed about knowing when to tuck the ball and run, but he'll never be on the level of the Michael Vick's and Tim Tebow's of the world (then again, not many of us are, for better or worse, right Vicky, you puppy-pounder? Karma is a bitch, ain't it...).

After I review the game I may amend this entry, or I may just leave it... it is, after all, just like the win. It'll do.

Knee-Jerk Reaction: Alcorn

2010-10-02T14:34:00.000-07:00

Meh.

A guy a few rows behind us took a survey late in the third quarter to ask if anyone else felt like our 35-16 lead felt more like a loss than a win. Most folks said 'push' and I agree.

Tyler Russell either had a bad game or is NOT as good as advertised. Relf made some mistakes but kept his composure. The D was disappointing. Refer to my score predictions to see why.

The Day After comes tomorrow... but thanks to the Fox/DishNetwork debacle, I do not have the benefit of watching a recording of the game. So we'll just see what happens...

All I Want is a Win...

2010-10-01T08:48:00.000-07:00

Just keep the ball rollin, baby! There's nothing like a win to cure what ails ya...

After the lack-luster performance in Death Valley the Bulldogs rallied to take care of business in the Bone Yard (that's my thing, I'm starting it... you heard it here first) against those back-of-the-pack Dawgs from the East.

This week the Bulldogs face a foe from SWAC in Alcorn State. So that means it's time for another theme song...

All I Do Is Win

All I Do is win win win no matter what.
got money on mind can never get enough,
and everytime I step up in the building...
everybody hands go UP!
and they stay there!
and they say yeah!
and they stay there!
Up down, up down, up down...
cause all I do is win win win...
and if you goin’ in put your hands in the air,
Make 'em stay there!

Now I know what you're thinking... Mr. Hooch, aren't you kinda "phoning it in" with this song? The answer may surprise you...

Yes. Yes I am. I am phoning it in by using the team's theme song for this week's theme song, but there is a very good reason. You see this is a preemptive "phone in" I am delivering with the hopes that the team won't do the same on the field Saturday.

MSU faces an undefeated opponent Saturday in Alcorn State, and even the lesser SEC teams often find themselves lacking the same emotion and intensity they have when facing other SEC schools as opposed to members of CUSA, SWAC, etc. You had better believe the Braves are planning on walking out of Starkville undefeated.

On the other side of the coin, MSU absolutely NEEDS this win. Don't believe me? Look at the rest of the schedule...

Houston, Florida, UAB, Kentucky, Alabama, Arkansas, Ole Miss.

How many of those are YOU counting as wins? A realistic/conservative estimate would be 3-4. Florida, Bama and OM are road games, and any SEC team can tell you that's never an easy task. Sure the Rebel's season looks to be circling the bowl already with loses to Vandy and Jacksonville State, but anyone can tell you when it comes to the Egg Bowl, throw the records out and get ready for some smash-mouth football.

If MSU gives up even one game among Alcorn, Houston, UAB, Kentucky or OM it could end up preventing them from going bowling in the post season. So let's get to the nitty-gritty.

KEYS TO THE GAME -

OFFENSE - Chris Relf took all the snaps against Georgia, but Coach Dan Mullen claims that Tyler Russell will see action this weekend and the 2 QB rotation is still in full effect. The game had to be a great confidence boost for Relf and the rest of the offense, even if Georgia did gift-wrap the game for us with some major penalties at bad times. The offense must carry that momentum forward and stay fired up. Anything less than 30 points will be unsatisfactory considering the level of competition we're facing. There's a lot riding on it...

DEFENSE - The Bulldog Defense did a decent job of keeping the other BulldAWGS out of the endzone until a late score in the 4th. Manny Diaz continues to improve and refine his schemes, seeming like a mad scientist with his constant tinkering, but hey, if it works, do it. But did it really work, or did we get a helping hand from the Georgia penalties? It's a very chickeny-eggy question.

BOTTOM LINE -

FOCUS - This will be the deciding factor in Saturday's contest. If the Bulldogs stay focused and keep their eyes on the prize, they walk away winning handily. Lose focus and the Braves could snatch a win from MSU before they know what hit them.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION:
MSU 35 ASU 6

REALISTIC PREDICITION:
MSU 30 ASU 13

And I'll leave you with another quote from this week's theme song... Al Davis said it best, just win, baby, win!

Snoop:
I hung with the worst of them,
bust till I burst on em,
floss em up, toss em up, Hardaway, boss em up.
pardon me I bossing the pressure up, bless ya bruh.
don’t wanna mess with us,
we like the U in the 80’s.
back to back set a trap,
hit the lick, hit it back,
hit the trick, jump the track,
bitch I want my money back!
time and time again while I’m sippin on this gin...
Al Davis said it best, just win baby win!

Killin Time

2010-09-22T14:31:00.000-07:00

Well, it was a less-than-stellar performance by the visiting Bulldogs last Saturday that resulted in the lopsided 29-7 score against LSU. If only the Dogs had taken to heart what I said in my last blog about taking care of the football... but alas, it wasn't meant to be.

No matter. It's a new week and time for a new foe... and of course, a new theme song!

Killing Time - Hed (P.E.)

I keep my eyes on the stars,
That's where I come from.
Belt of Orion.
Son of a sun God.
You know my name, I'm the conqueror...
The Lion-King,
Kamehameha, come.
Twenty-twelve, come 12 tribes, come 12 strands, come 12 lives.
12 steps, 12 months, 12 muthafuckers...
All make bail, kicked 'cause of the crowded jails.
Sex and violence sells...
12 serial killers, 12 dead without a trail or trace,
It's prime time, the fight night, pay-per-view, suicide,
The Bee-Sting-Butterfly!

So... is MSU just killing time? This weekend will tell the tale...the Bulldogs face a Georgia team that began the season ranked in the top 25 before putting together a 1-2(0-2) record. Georgia and Mississippi State have played eerily similar opponents thus far in the season, with Georgia losing at South Carolina, and again at home in a heartbreaker against Arkansas. Meanwhile Mississippi State first lost at home in a close game to Auburn before going on the road to Tiger Stadium where they all but handed the game to LSU.

This match-up is one that both fan bases are viewing as a "must win" game, and no one knows that better than the coaches and players.

KEYS TO THE GAME -

OFFENSE - It's not Christmas yet, so for Christ's sake STOP GIVING THE BALL AWAY! Chris Relf and Tyler Russell combined to throw SEVEN interceptions in last week's game. I couldn't find any record of a collegiate football team winning a game after giving up 7 turnovers... but I did find this. Guess that last one was just a bit too much, huh?

DEFENSE - The MSU defense looked great in the second half against Auburn, and carried much of that momentum forward to the first half of their match-up with LSU, holding the tigers to 4 field goals and no TD's in the first half. However they could not keep up the pressure in the second half, whether it was due to effort, mistakes or coaching. The defense will catch a break with prospective-NFL receiver AJ Green being suspended for this weekend's game, though.

QUARTERBACKS - Will Chris Relf finally emerge as a true starting quarterback? Will Russell usurp Relf and take the helm? Will EITHER of them manage not to throw any INT's? Why do I sound like the end of an episode of Soap? The 2 QB system has it's advantages, and they will likely be easier to see this weekend than in the past three games. Still, it's up to the QB's to get the ball in the hands of the right guys at the right times.

BOTTOM LINE - Who wants it the most? That's who's going to win this weekend. Obviously taking care of the ball is key, so if the Bulldogs are plagued by turnovers again this weekend look for some drastic changes on the offensive side of the ball. But both Georgia and MSU badly need this win to make their way towards the post-season.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 21 GA 14

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 14 GA 21

Shake it off...

2010-09-15T13:55:00.000-07:00

Well, despite all the opportunities our beloved Bulldogs snatched defeat from the jaws of victory last Thursday, losing to Auburn 17-14. Ignoring the 10 points AU scored from our two costly turnovers on offense, the WR's dropped about 6 passes in the 2nd half (a half which also saw our defense blank the Tigers), 1-2 of which could've broken for big-time plays and potential scores. Also there was a near interception on defense that could've resulted in a pick-6, but alas it was not to be.

But that's ok, it's a new week, and a new foe, so it's time to shake it off...

THEME SONG THIS WEEK -
The Donnas - Take It Off

Go on and take it off
(echo) Take it off!
You gotta shake it off baby, for me
C'mon and break me off
(echo) Break me off!
'Cause I get what I want and I like what I see!

This week the Bulldogs face another set of Tigers... The Bayou Bengals. Going on the road in the SEC is never easy, and winning at Tiger Stadium in Baton Rouge has proven to be a tough task for the Bulldogs in the last decade. Through the first two games of the season LSU's defensive front is putting up solid numbers. There are some questions at the QB position, though, which could prove beneficial for MSU.

KEYS TO THE GAME -

DEFENSE - MSU's defense held Auburn scoreless in the second half of last Thursday's game. The defense will need to build on that success and maintain their momentum, as they face another dual-threat QB in Jordan Jefferson. Although Jefferson is not as "dyn-o-mite" as Cam Newton, he can run the ball. The Bulldogs will have to shut down the running game to try and force LSU to beat them through the air. If that happens, we have a shot.

OFFENSE - The MSU offense gave up two turnovers last week and Auburn monopolized on those opportunities big time. The offense must protect the ball and execute plays. The microscope will be focused on the WR's until they show they can make the catches they need to make. In order to open up the passing game I think you will see MSU try to run the ball a bit more this week, likely at the edges with some option plays before they try to send Ballard or Perkins up the middle. If they can move the chains with the running game the world is their proverbial oyster.

TURNOVERS - Turnovers have been a hallmark of MSU football in the last decade, but not the good kind like you like. For the Bulldogs to win they have GOT to protect the ball. They will likely need the help of a pick-6 to come out on top, though, so forcing turnovers is a must.

BOTTOM LINE - For the Bulldogs to get what they want and like what they see, they have to come out ahead in the turnover margin.

WILD AND WOOLLY PREDICTION -
MSU 24 - LSU 21

REALISTIC PREDICTION -
MSU 17 - LSU 27

I sure hope I'm a Woolly Bully come Saturday night...

Go time...

2010-09-09T10:19:00.001-07:00

To borrow a phrase from the greatest show that never got a third season, Frisky Dingo, it's "Go time, mother-humpers!"

Tonight MSU faces Auburn in a truly pivotal game for both teams' seasons. A win for Auburn tonight sets the War Eagles/Tigers/Plainsmen/whatevertheHELLtheyarethisweek (snip-snap!) on the road to an Iron Bowl showdown with Alabama which will likely determine the SEC West participant for the SEC Championship game in Atlanta. A loss for Auburn and they are effectively out of the running unless they manage to run the table in the west, which is never an easy task.

On the other side of the coin, a win for MSU would lend some credence to the already mounting evidence that Dan Mullen and his Bulldogs are on the rise and are now a legitimate threat in the SEC. A loss doesn't end the season, but it leaves a lot of work left to be done if the Bulldogs are to make a bowl appearance this postseason.

There are a lot of subplots in this match-up, but none more compelling than the man under center for Auburn. Cam Newton, the new star QB, once studied under MSU head coach Dan Mullen while both were at Florida. Newton was all but sold on playing for MSU and Mullen until he suddenly changed his commitment to Auburn at the last minute. Comments made by Newton's father would lead Joe Fan to believe his son was too good to play for lowly MSU...

AND I QUOTE:
“He was leaning toward Starkville.,” Cecil Newton said to the Montgomery Advertiser. “He had that relationship with Dan Mullen and there was a comfort level there. I didn’t think that was the right place for Cam. They just don’t have all the moving parts. Cam was going to have to be the star. He’d have to do everything himself. I didn’t want him to be a rented mule.”
End quote.

The rented mule bit is too easy, so we won't go there. Suffice to say there will be no love lost between MSU's fans and Auburn's QB, but when hasn't that been the case? Dan Mullen did quite a job of game-planning for another QB he mentored last season, and although the Bulldogs fell to Florida, I expect to see more of this tonight.

After suffering through the last decade as an MSU fan, it's difficult for me to view tonight's game objectively. I'm trying to remain realistic, but in truth I want Auburn to feel like Felicity "Fat-tits" Finnegan when we get done with them this Thursday night ("Aw, so close to the weekend, that is rough...").

But in the end, my fandom wins out every time. I believe both teams have quality athletes on both sides of the ball. I'm not completely sold on Gene Chizik as a coach, although he looks a hell of a lot better than the Lane Kiffins of the world. One thing I do know, though... that Dan Mullen's crafty.

Hooch out!

Welcome back, old friend...

2010-08-06T14:11:00.000-07:00

It's the most wonderful time of the year...

Honestly, if they'd only start fall camp a week or two earlier it would literally be Christmas in July. Football is back and I am basking in it's warm and fuzzy glow. This is the greatest time of the year for all the fans, because it's all still out there, waiting to be played. Everyone's favorite team is undefeated and gearing up to run the table all the way to the National Championship game. The coaches and players are gearing up, working out, and practicing their asses off (if they know what's good for them).

As an out-and-out Mississippi State fan it's hard not to see the world through maroon-colored glasses right now, but I try to remain realistic. Even so, our program is definitely on the rise.

Since the end of what is commonly referred to as the "Croom Error" (pronounced "era", and yes that honestly is Sly Croom in that pic) Mississippi State has made a lot of headway in very little time. Fresh off the heels of a 5-7 season that saw the Bulldogs lose by narrow margins and marginal officiating against the nation's second toughest schedule (or first, depending on your sources) the Maroon and White looks to be much improved on both sides of the ball.

Second year head coach Dan Mullen enters his sophomore season at the helm with all the momentum he can muster. This offensive genius was a heavy contributor to Urban Meyer's win column as the offensive coordinator at Florida. And in his first season as head coach he took a team that performed abysmally under "Sly" Croom and pulled a complete 180. Much of the workload last season was borne by Anthony "Boobie" Dixon, who has since been signed by the San Fransico 49ers.

However with Dixon's graduation there is no one star on the offensive side of the ball for opposing coaches to game plan around. But this suits Mullen's system just fine. Mullen will be employing a spread option offense again this season, and with a taller and more athletic QB leading the offense the sky's the limit. The running back stable is full of talent in the likes of Vick Ballard and Nick Elliot, and it's up to these young men as to who will step up and fill Dixon's sizeable shoes.

On the defensive side of the ball, injuries plagued the Bulldogs last season, but as of the time this post was written the entire 2-deep rotation is in perfect health and looking strong. Players like Pernell McPhee (6'4" 285 lbs.) and James Carmon (6'7" 245 lbs.) will create all sorts of mismatch opportunities on the line, allowing Manny Diaz to install aggressive blitz packages from everywhere. This will hearken back to MSU's glory days on defense, when Joe Lee Dunn was the defensive coordinator for Jackie Sherrill.

And that's only the tip of the iceberg. For the first time this CENTURY the Bulldogs actually have depth at most of their positions. Nevermind that they are staring another pre-season top 5 strength of schedule in the face again. MSU faces defending National Champs Alabama, and preseason coach's poll favorites Florida (3), Arkansas (19) and Auburn (23) on the road. Dan Mullen is looking to win every single one of these games, and based on his and his team's performance last season, there's a chance he could pull it off.

But like I said, I try to remain realistic, and it is with that thought in mind that I present my best guesstimation of how the season will play out for the Bulldogs. I can see the Dogs finishing 5-7, I expect them to finish 6-6 and win their bowl game handily, and I would be ecstatic with 7-5 or anything better.

Mississippi State Bulldogs 2010 Schedule

Sept. 4 Memphis - W
Sept. 9 Auburn - L*
Sept. 18 at LSU - L
Sept. 25 Georgia - L
Oct. 2 Alcorn State - W
Oct. 9 at Houston - W
Oct. 16 at Florida - L
Oct. 23 UAB - W
Oct. 30 Kentucky - W
Nov. 6 OPEN DATE
Nov. 13 at Alabama - L
Nov. 20 Arkansas - L
Nov. 27 at Ole Miss - W

So this is how I see it playing out. First off we'll take the non-conference games. Memphis looks to be a cellar-dweller in an already out-matched CUSA match up, and the Bulldogs historically take care of business against Memphis even in their worst of seasons. Alcorn State and UAB, I mean you no disrespect, but these are pretty much a given.

The asterisk(*) beside the Auburn game is for one simple reason: This is the game that could define the Bulldogs' season. It's their first conference game, coming at home against a good Auburn team that will be marshaled by Cam Newton. This will be Newton's first SEC game, and the MSU defense will give him a waaaarm welcome. Also, Dan Mullen worked with Newton when both were in Florida, before Newton was dismissed and Mullen was hired away, so Mullen knows at least a bit about what to expect and what weaknesses Newton might exhibit. A win here gives the Dogs momentum going into a tough game at Tiger Stadium the next week, and LSU could get off to rocky start as well.

Assuming the Dogs go 1-1 in their first two SEC games that will give this team enough confidence in itself to know they can line up and beat any given team on any given day. A loss to Auburn could have the Bulldogs second guessing themselves before they even get started this season. It is for this reason I put the asterisk by the Auburn game, as a win in this game could launch the following alternate timeline:

Sept. 4 Memphis - W
Sept. 9 Auburn - W*
Sept. 18 at LSU - W
Sept. 25 Georgia - L
Oct. 2 Alcorn State - W
Oct. 9 at Houston - W
Oct. 16 at Florida - L
Oct. 23 UAB - W
Oct. 30 Kentucky - W
Nov. 6 OPEN DATE
Nov. 13 at Alabama - L
Nov. 20 Arkansas - W
Nov. 27 at Ole Miss - W

So now you're obviously thinking "I'll have whatever HE'S having." Nine wins? I mean this is Mississippi State, right? Right. This is Mississippi State. The same team that, in 1999, had several dramatic "come from behind" victories in the last 2 minutes or less of many of their games. The same team that in 1991 beat highly touted Texas 13-6. The same team that in 1980 defeated Alabama 6-3 and ended Alabama's all-time school record 28-game winning streak and all-time SEC record 27-game conference winning streak.

These Bulldogs are often underrated, and that will work to their favor this season. A word of warning to the perennial powerhouses of the SEC; Overlook these Dogs at your peril.

Aaahhhh... football is in the air. Can you feel it?

The Competitour...

2010-07-20T14:16:00.000-07:00

What follows is the amalgamation of all the posts made on our team blog for our Competitour in the summer of 2009. I have edited a bit to remove superfluous data and try to maintain the integrity of the thread... this is really more for me than anyone else, but there's definitely some good reading in here when I get to recapping the days/challenges.FYI I bolded the topic/title of the posts to keep it readable... >---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jan/Sean

Team WEATHEHEKAWI

* Starkville, MS

* handles: hooch, jmorgan811

* watch their videos: www.youtube.com/wea0728

* Team Name Challenge:

Jan & Sean are believed to be descendants of a long lost Native

American Tribe which is thought to have it's origins in Mississippi.

They were a nomadic people, however they were not believed to be very

good at tracking or navigation. As a result, the tribe tended to

stray from their intended course. Eventually the tribe disappeared

completely, and was thought to be lost forever. Recently

archaeologists have unearthed maps used by the Weathehekawai people.

Upon examination, these maps were found to be both incorrect and

incomplete. Legend has it that late at night during the full moon,

the ancient voices of the tribe members can still be heard calling out

to each other, trying to find their way home...

"Where The Heck Are We" Going?

Well, at this point we don't know. But soon our initial destination will be revealed. Then it's off to Europe for an adventure like no other. Follow our adventure on YouTube at www.youtube.com/wea0728 and right here on our blog. Let us hear from you all. We will need lots of support if we are going to surpass the 10 other teams to become the victors!!

Last edited by jmorgan811; 07-26-2009 at 07:47 PM.

This is a wonderful adventure for you guys. I'll be keeping up with you. I have also forwarded your email to some of my other family members (Kay, Tip, Bev, my sisters, etc.) so you'll have mucho gringos checking you out and keeping up with you. NumbaTwo - watch out for the European Sheilas!!! Love to both of you and good luck/bon chance/buena suerte/viel gluck (OK. That's all the languages in which I'm even remotely familiar with common phrases!!)

Art

how about the "Canadian Sheila's"

Don't worry about the European "Sheila's" - its the Canadian Sheila (aka Kismet) and Laura (aka Eureka) that you have to worry about ( hahaha).

kismet

Well, Ifinally got it right, with your help.

Thanks for your help...Now I am good to go! I look forward to two weeks of exciting reports from exciting places, and I'm real excited! GOOD LUCK!

Danna

OK, Kids. I'm ready for some exciting news. It has been raining in KO (and in Starkvegas) for most of the time since you guys left. Being in the house, I'm looking for a little excitement. Help a boy out!! I figure you guys are probably about 8 hours ahead of us, so you're probably supping and wondering where you can buy a Swiss knife to help you in your quest. Yes, I'm bored. That's why I'm rambling!! Love both of you guys!!

Art

Very good one, Sheila! Eh?

Art

Do Us Proud!

Great article about your grand adventure in today's SDN! I'm very excited about following your progress!! I’ll have to admit to being a little worried after discovering that you’re genetically predisposed to getting lost, but I have confidence that you’ll do us proud.

Libby

day 1 is in the books

...and boy was it a doozy! We travelled all over Geneva (the city center) and took a train ride about 45 minutes around Lake Geneva to the Olympic Fairgrounds and Museum!

We have uploaded some videos of our challenges to http://www.youtube.com/wea0728 so check it out!

I will go in to more detail when I have some time, but it has been a wild ride today, as you will see in some of the videos. Tomorrow we fly to Munich (that's Germany, kids!) and then take a train to Salzburg, Austria (and that's Austria, just in case you're keeping track)...Switzerland to Germany to Austria, and that's all before lunch! Ok I'll stop yelling at you now...until next time!

-Sean aka Numba2, Stan, Hooch, and other unmentionables...

Old 07-30-2009, 03:44 PM

Sounds like you Yanks are off to a great start. I saw the reference to the Starkville newspaper by Libby. I'm going to try to access it. Hang in there!! I'm ready for them to post some stats or something like that so I can see how you guys are doing. I know you're having a ball!!!! Just watched all the videos so I'm certain you're loving it. I would have ordered a beer by not saying a word - just waving a 5 Euro note in the air and pointing to the tap, but that's just me.

Art

Sounds FABULOUS!! Things on the homefront are relatively quiet. Lots and lots of rain, though. I'm excited about following your adventures.

Libby

Third place with a bullet!

Found the post-day 3 stats and see that you guys are in the thick of things. Great work! Just watched all the days 3 & 4 videos. See that Hooch ditched mom in favor of a brew. Wonder from where that inclination was passed down to him? Another beer-related question: When you guys were doing the "bobsled" thing, did you have to bribe the folks with free beer? I can tell that you guys are having a ball!!!

Art

better late than never...

Sorry for the delay in updating the blog, we've been working our tails off and it hasn't left much time for updating blogs and such. Let's recap day 2...

Salzburg, Austria:

Stiegl Brewery tour...First of all, in our attempt to get to the brewery we managed to ride the number 27 bus the wrong way, twice. But I am now very familiar with a certain route around the city center and outlying areas. Once at the brewery we ate an interesting sausage and cheese platter...I liked it, Jan did not. The beer was gut, ya!

Hellbrunn Palace... If I were a contemporary of the Cardinal whose name I cannot remember, we definitely would've been friends. Several places around the palace are 'booby trapped' with different water tricks. The video doesn't do it justice. And don't bother watching me sing...if there's no loud music to cover my singing, it's like nightmare-karaoke. You've been warned...

World's thinnest house...is, in a word, thin.

Pferdeschwemme... I went a little "Hi I'm Vince from Sham-Wow!" on it, but I think it works.

Through poor planning and even worse communication myself and several other competitouristas were turned away from Red Bull's Hangar 7, but no great loss...we made up for it last night.

More to come...

Edited to add: Sean will be writing all the blog stuff unless otherwise noted.

Last edited by jmorgan811; 08-01-2009 at 06:10 PM. Reason: because I frickin wanted to, ok?

Old 08-01-2009, 06:22 PM

...and then there was day 3

This day left us feeling like complete failures...yet somehow we managed to scrape together a spot at third place.

Kelsteinhaus (Eagle's Nest)... This was Hitler's little "home away from home." A bunker built into the side of a mountain, and it's gi-normous. We were practically breaking our arms patting ourselves on the back for all the research we did on this challenge beforehand, only to find that we were wrong about some things. Details aren't important, we got the points since it wasn't a Risk/Reward challenge, but we were bummed when some of the other teams informed us of our mistakes. It really was an interesting place, and all of the disturbing Nazi crap was confined to the Dokumentation Center. We took a bus up a one lane road literally into the clouds, we could not see anything. Wish we could've spent more time there, but we had to hustle up and get our toboggan run done...

Toboggan run... yeeeaaahhhhh. Not so good. We did not have enough time to make it to any other challenges due to transportation woes, so we used a little resourcefulness to improvise a toboggan run of our own with two other teams. The judges must have taken pity on us, because they actually gave us points. Thanks guys!

One of the reasons we ran out of time was because we had to catch a train back to Munich that night. We arrived in Munich, boarded the S-bahn (think subway) and Tyler met a group of ladies that invited us out to join their bachelorette party. So Tyler, Dan and myself left our hotel at 11:30 at night to find Kult Fabrik...you can get the rest of the story privately, I'm not airing out other people's business, or my own. Suffice it to say I returned to the hotel happy but weary at just after 5 am, Munich-time.

And with that, day 3 was in the books!

Old 08-01-2009, 06:42 PM

and on the fourth day...

We had a deceptively good start to the day and thought the worst of our problems were behind us. Little did we know...

Viktualeinmarkt... after lucking out and getting 5 hours of sleep (I expected to get 1-2 tops) we made our way to Munich's premiere outdoor market, where we convinced some locals to show us a few different methods for eating a popular white sausage. Things went relatively smoothly and we were on to the next challenge...

Frauenkirche... Aside from walking right past an item we were looking for the first time, this challenge went well. In and out in around 30 minutes, and we were feeling good about our progress. No snags in travel or navigation...

Loden Frey... This is like the Macy's or Bloomingdale's of Germany...on the third floor they have all the traditional clothing like Lederhosen and such. We were going to incorporate one of the employees in our video until she informed us we weren't allowed to do ANY filming inside the store. So what did we do? We snuck around the corner and did it anyway...bad dog!

...at this point it's around 2:30 or 3 in the afternoon. Our last challenge was to find two different sculptures in the city and say a little something about them. We knew it might be difficult to find them going in, but we tried anyway. We managed to find the first 'sculpture' with a little help, but as you can see in our video, it was removed very recently. No harm, no foul. There was still plenty of evidence that we were in the right spot. Off to find the last sculpture and wrap up this cake-walk of a day, right?

Wrong.

Nature's call precluded a direct trip to what we later discovered wasn't the correct spot. In the course of 5 minutes, thanks to oblivious hourly employees of random German restaurant, my teammate and I were sent out different doors to look for each other. We didn't see each other again for 2-3 hours.

Luckily my teammate came through (way to go, Mom!) and found the other location, where she discovered that this sculpture ALSO had been removed. Again, the evidence was overwhelming so we feel like we achieved our goals.

All in all not a bad day, possibly one of our better ones, but we will have to wait and see the scoring to know for sure. It's closing in on 2 am here now and I was planning to be in bed an hour ago, but I wanted to update everyone.

Tomorrow we take another swing at Munich...different challenges, different adventures, same crazy pace. After we wrap up our day in Munich we will hop a train to Cologne. Who knows what will happen after that...stay tuned!

Old 08-02-2009, 01:18 PM

You guys are kickin' some booty! WayToGo! First place is within reach. Keeping up with you has been a lot of fun. And, a note of interest...WZZQ 102, the defunct Jackson rock station, debuted online today. If you have web access and get tired of Pandora, check out zzq102.com. And...what the hell is wrong with "your daddy's beer"? Hooch didn't seem to mind hitting his daddy's beers when he was a "teener or tweener"!!!

Last edited by Art; 08-02-2009 at 01:26 PM.

Art

what day is it?

Days...blurring together...can't think straight!

We wrapped up Munich yesterday, but it seems like a month ago.

Nymphenburg Palace... Hugh Hefner eat your heart out! This palace was the bomb-diggity! Paintings of beautiful, scantily clad women all over the place! The hunting lodge was a disco club waiting to happen, the bathhouse had amazing art work (i.e. more nude women) on the ceilings, and even Prince Ludwig's rides were totally pimped out! I thought convertibles were a relatively new invention!

Koniglicher Hirschgarten... This was the king's private deer garden. Sounds lame until you walk in and realize the place is basically a giant beer garden that can accommodate up to 8000 people. We created a new brand name for raddler's, which the British would call a shandy...and some really kick-ass guys and gals helped us film the commercial. We also came up with a great new mascot for the place, so go check out the videos!

That was it for the challenges...well, for the challenges that were worth any points. Myself, Tyler and Steve had another challenge when we managed to board the wrong train, which had us arriving in Cologne, Germany around 2 am. What is up with all these late nights?! When it was all said and done we had a blast on the train ride, and managed to get our challenges done today as well, but that's another story, and I'm going to bed. Big day tomorrow!!!

Old 08-05-2009, 12:06 PM

Hooch: Does this mean that your next adventure is going to be backpacking through Europe? Have you forgotten "Hostel" and "Hostel 2"?? You know they had to be true stories, don't you? I mean, Hollyweird would never embellish. And stay away from the Dutch weed!! OK. THAT was fun!!! Later, you guys...

Art

Wuzzup?

Fallen to sixth place? Time to go out tonight and get good and drunk and don't even think about the competition. Just like we used to do every year at our district softball tournament at Meridian. Works like a charm. No pressure because you'll be too busy thinking about your stomach!!!!

Art

Fun, fun, fun?

Your videos indicated you guys were having a ball. The race results don't tell the whole story, I'm sure. Another adventure which you will never forget so, all things considered, it was...fun, fun, fun!!!! Have a safe trip home. A-Bomb is officially a kindergarten student. God save the Starkville School District! No. Wait. She's a female so maybe she won't be like her daddy!!!!!!

Art

I will try to update the final two days of the challenge for the blog when I have some time, maybe tonight. If you've been following the live scoring you know we didn't win, but we still had a blast, so I'll try and recount our adventures when I get the chance.

Congrats to Rad and Lanthy, and to everybody who was in the competition with us. We had a wonderful time, made some great new friends and had one of the best trips ever...what more could you want?

Hooch

Old 08-28-2009, 04:42 PM

Day 6

So it's a month later now, but I'll try to remember this as best I can...

Marksburg Castle... We ran into a couple other teams here, and some of our favorites to boot! (I miss the Cougars!) The castle itself was pretty interesting, and I was happy with the videos we were able to produce considering that we weren't supposed to be filming in the first place. I thought our ViktorWear commercial was great...

Koblenz Walking Tour... This was a cool challenge. Very interesting and entertaining...we got to see a statue of a little boy spit water on unsuspecting people, we saw a clock face that moved it's eyes and stuck it's tongue out, we saw a piece of the Berlin Wall that had been transplanted to this locality...Koblenz was one of my favorite cities for sure.

It's all kind of a blur but I THINK this is the night that the Oedipus Gang supped along the Rhine River and met a Super Sayin Vampire by the name of Willem (pronounced Vil-em). Good food and great company...

Hooch

Old 08-28-2009, 05:05 PM

When the levee breaks...

Day 7 was our undoing...

We entered the day in 2nd or 3rd place, but this day was full of surprises.

Day 7 was a 'double points' day and was also a '4 country mystery tour' day. We later found out that three of the four countries were the Netherlands, Belgium and Germany. It was a place called Vaalserberg, where you can literally stand in one place and be in all three countries at once. They also have the world's largest hedge-labyrinth, which we turned in a total suck time on. But that was only one challenge...

We also did a little skeet shooting with laser rifles...no, not quite like the red and blue laser rifles from GI Joe. I scored second over all which I was pretty happy with considering I've shot a gun like twice before in my life.

But lasers aren't dangerous enough, so then we moved up to real crossbows. I still maintain that my crossbow's sight was off, because I was dead center for the first shot, which lined up vertically, but was off to the right by about a foot. So for the second shot I tried to adjust by shifting to the left a bit. Great, now I was only about half a foot off center. I tried to compensate on the third shot, but apparently I didn't do a very good job because all three bolts ended up right of center and we graded out pretty poorly.

...and finally, one of the coolest things we did this day. We go to Maastricht, at least I think that's where it was, and find out that our final challenge of the day was to complete an unguided navigation adventure in Cassemates, which was several kilometers of underground fortress created by the locals to defend themselves from invading forces. This challenge was a blast, but we turned in a bad time here as well, thus dooming ourselves to a place in the middle of the pack. No worries though, this was definitely one of the coolest things we did the whole trip, and I had a blast fumbling around in the dark, breaking codes, figuring out riddles and generally being an explorer.

Hooch

Old 08-28-2009, 05:19 PM

the last day...

Just two challenges this day...we tried to get the most points possible to at least make it respectable.

Snow World... This. Was. Cool. (no pun intended) World's largest indoor skiing facility. I am an accomplished skier, having skied several times in my younger days in Utah, Colorado, and even once in the Appalachians. Turns out skiing is a lot like riding a bike...at least for me it is, because it came right back to me.

Rail Biking... huh? Yeah that's what I said too, but this was pretty neat. Now it probably didn't blow me away like some of the other folks on the tour who have lived in big cities all their lives but I rather enjoyed it. We boarded a pedal-driven device and peddled our butts 14 kilometers along some old abandoned railroads with one twenty minute break in the middle. And half of that was UP HILL!!! Both ways! In the snow! wait...bah you get the idea.

And that's it...that was our last challenge. That night after we returned to Aachen (I think that's where we were) several of us went out for a drink and enjoyed each others' company. All in all I really like the rest of the teams and had a blast on this trip, so if you're reading this just know this trip was totally worth it.

I made some great friends, had some incredible and wonderful experiences, and even though we didn't win I had a great time. And now I'm an official Competitourista! I wonder if there's a tattoo for that, like the Iron Man tattoo that Sheila from Team Serendipity is sporting...hm, I'll have to look into that.

Cheers!

Hooch

Old 08-29-2009, 10:31 PM

No tattoos....just hot-iron branding.

SteveB

branding eh? show me the design, I might be game...

Hooch

VICTORY!!!! (sort of...)

2010-07-19T13:35:00.001-07:00

So I recently went looking for my blog entries on the Competitours Forums so that I could transcribe them somewhere more permanent. I did this with the intention of saving my "memories" of that whirlwind race so I could remind myself of what actually happened...

Well it turns out the owner of the forum did not renew their lease, so I thought my blog was in the proverbial wind... but thanks to the power of the inter-tubes I was able to retrieve my blog!

cache:http://www.whateverwebaddressyouwant.com/andstuff.html

Apparently you can simply enter "cache:" before the URL of the desired page to retrieve it... within limits. It looks like 6 months is the average for cached pages.

At any rate, I have copied and pasted our exploits to a text file on my computer, and will, at a later and as yet undefined date, transcribe said blog onto this, uh, blog.

So I'm calling it a victory, and considering the recent shenanigans with my bank card being hacked and all my money being ganked, I needed this.

Things I'm excited about...

2010-01-14T10:29:00.000-08:00

for the upcoming year:

The rest of basketball season (Go Dawgs!)

Spring

My friend Tony getting home from his 2nd tour in Iraq

the fact that this po-dunk town finally has decent racquetball courts I can use

My friends from up north threatening to visit in April

Summer

the Neshoba County Fair

seeing just how badly O'bama falls on his face when everyone finally realizes how full of shit he was/is...

possibly getting out of this po-dunk town for a few days here and there...

the start of football season (go Dawgs!)

the show Archer on FX, because if I can't have more Frisky Dingo then this will just have to do

...and possibly a few other things.

The end of an era?

2009-12-10T13:33:00.001-08:00

One of my fay-vo-rite bloggers, none other than Mr. Saddawg himself, has officially left the building...

I'm not quite sure what he's up to or where he's off to, but I wish him and his coochies well...

All hail the almighty dollar!

2009-06-26T13:15:00.001-07:00

I have 'monetized' my blog. I expect the first of my internet millions to come rolling in any day now...

In the meanwhile, let me post a reminder to myself to post some of the more amusing stories from my life when I have the time. These stories include, but are not limited to; the Tinactin debacle, the wordless exchange with the guy at Lenscrafters about the crazy old lady, the story of how I broke my nose, how I broke my arm, my deaf friend Matt (powerman5000), the time I accidentally covered Matt with ketchup, and many, many more.

Wait, what?

2009-06-18T14:22:00.000-07:00

I just read a journal entry from one Roger Ebert, with whom some of you might be familiar...I must admit he took me a bit by surprise. Having never met this person I had formed an opinion of him, his characteristics, his mannerisms, his beliefs...In my mind he was someone whom I had very little in common with but, as it turns out, we see eye to eye on the subject of religion:

Raised as a Roman Catholic, I internalized the social values of that faith and still hold most of them, even though its theology no longer persuades me. I wrote about that, too. I have no quarrel with what anyone else subscribes to; everyone deals with these things in his own way, and I have no truths to impart. All I require of a religion is that it not insist I believe in it. I know a priest, a lovely man, whose eyes twinkle when he says, "You go about God's work in your way, and I'll go about it in His."

I could not have said it better myself...

Roger Ebert's Journal - May 2, 2009

I miss Australia

2009-02-18T00:27:00.000-08:00

It hurts sometimes. To feel like you absolutely belong somewhere that you can't be...somewhere that is out of reach or off limits to you...but you just know in your heart that's where you belong. Despite all your best interests and inclinations you just feel, way down deep in your gut, that that's where you're supposed to be...yeah, I'm not there.

And it hurts a little.

interesting find...

2009-01-29T12:44:00.000-08:00

My boss stopped by my cube yesterday and introduced me to something new.

It's a new piece of software from Microsoft (currently free as it's still in developement phase) called Songsmith.

So you sing into your mic and the software analyzes the tempo, tone, etc. and creates music to back your singing. You can choose from styles like rock, country, polka, etc.

Of course, like anything free and mildly entertaining on the web, it's all over youtube already, so now, for your viewing pleasure...

Ozzy does the Crazy Train Polka!

Now, while it is obviously not right, it does seem to do a passable job of creating timed measures that more or less fit with the singing...but compare that to this...

Britney goes Toxic on the Islands...

and you start to see why people like me and my dad judge songs and singers on their lyrics and vocal abilities instead of just eagerly lapping up whatever MTV or the media equivalent spouts as the new, big thing.

a little political humor...

2009-01-26T14:32:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine just sent me this...

If you aren't familiar with the Fresh Prince of Bel Air as sung by one Will Smith then don't bother clicking...but it's still funny...

Whoops...

2009-01-23T00:12:00.000-08:00

I made a mistake, or at least I've convinced myself that I have...

My previous blog entry mentions a show and network by name, and I've realized that if I do that people will have automatic reactions to said network/show.

In an effort to keep my blog and my (two) viewers honest, I am not going to refer to any shows or networks by name anymore...both for honesty and, more importantly, copyrights' sake...that way I'm totally legal, right?

Like I care...

I'm pissed...

2009-01-20T14:18:00.000-08:00

...and no I don't mean I'm drunk. I'm pissed off because I found out yesterday that my favorite show has been canceled.

The show is called Frisky Dingo and it's on Cartoon Network's segment called Adult Swim. For those of you who don't know, Adult Swim consists of cartoons with adult situations and comedy. Some other examples of shows you might know that are on Adult Swim are Family Guy and Aqua Teen Hunger Force. You might remember ATHF for this little bit of advertising genius...

Now I could sit here and try to explain, or give a brief synopsis of the plot, but you either care or you don't. You're interested or you aren't. There really isn't much middle ground.

Anyway, in honor of what -I- consider to be the funniest new show on TV in the last five years being cut short after two measly seasons, here are a couple of links to some clips from the show...

First up is Mr. Ford, in this scene working as a polling consultant for the shows primary villain, Killface, who is running for president. When asked what Americans wanted this was his response... short, sweet, and pretty damn accurate.

And then there's Wendell Stamp, another of the shows minor characters, who is tasked with the job of finding a bus for Killface and company to go on the campaign trail. Ignore the explanations they've added, that's not part of the show.

And lastly here's a nice little montage of several scenes from season 2.

"Oh where's your girlfriend?"
"Oh she burned to death."
"Oh my god, put your penis in my vagina!"

Keep digging, Andy...

2009-01-16T08:53:00.000-08:00

By now you've probably heard about the Ole Miss basketball coach, Andy Kennedy, and his arrest in December following the alleged (yeah right, and I allegedly like blowjobs) assault of a Cincy cab driver. If not, you have now...

The newest wrinkle in this story, however, is far more entertaining than I could've imagined. You see, his wife Kimber is claiming that the defamation of her supposedly saintly husband's character has led to a 'decreased performance' in the sack.

I'll give you a moment to let the barrage of basketball-sex puns fly through your mind.

Done? Ok, so anyway my first thought was that if I were (still) married and my wife sued the guy I beat up and a witness for this I'd be pissed and embarrassed.

But the reality of the situation is that Raggedy-Andy has had a reputation around Oxford for quite some time as a hard-drinking, co-ed tail-chasing jerk-off. Rumor has it he also likes to pass out over half eaten subway sandwiches at 1:30 am. At Subway. Classy fellah, eh?

So Kimber, this message is for you. The person you should be suing is your husband. For half. Of everything. And I'd do it quick...before the cabbie decides to retire after winning his case against your racist alcoholic husband.

sweet christ...

2009-01-15T00:56:00.000-08:00

god bless those spivey boys...they really are good people...

It's just...well...by the time they ever get to my house they are three sheets to the wind, fit-shaced bastards....

It gets old.

2009-01-14T23:19:00.000-08:00

Welcome to me.

It's one:twenty-ish...as the crow flies.

Me and one of the Spivey's (yes, I R know that grammar is B A D) are playing guitar hero treese...I fail, yet win at the same time because I can play lame-o games instead of the real thing.

Winner is me.

and the saga continues...

2009-01-14T13:27:00.000-08:00

I finally had my court date for the eviction proceedings. It wasn't as entertaining as I had hoped, but the result is the same.

For those of you just joining us, I was renting a house. It was foreclosed upon when the owner (not me) didn't make his mortgage payments. I found out about this when the eviction notice came in the mail.

At that point I made an offer on the house. They accepted my offer. And they're still evicting me.

....anyway, I had hoped that when I showed up in court armed with this information and the proof to back it up that the judge would be a 'good, down-home boy' and really light up the opposing lawyer. Unfortunately that was not to be the case.

It was enjoyable to see the lawyer squirm when I broke the news that the evictee was buying the house. As we were leaving the courtroom the lawyer mumbled something to me along the lines of 'those assholes NEVER tell me ANYTHING!' and stalked off to his car.

Gotta say it's a good day when you start off by ruining a lawyer's day.

Music rocks...

2009-01-08T01:21:00.000-08:00

It's one of those nights...
I've had a drink or two... and no one in particular is monopolizing my time...

I'm actually rocking out to a heavy-ass song sung totally in Japanese and even though I took four semesters I don't understand a word. Too damn fast. The funny thing is I understand the sentiment of what they're trying to convey.

Music really is a universal language.

The story so far...

2008-12-23T10:03:00.000-08:00

The story so far....

In June of 08 I sign a rental agreement with a son-of-a-bitch named Sterling Dahl at Crye-Leike realtors of Starkville, MS. I am told that the house my roommate and I will be renting is going to be fixed up and all major appliances will be in working order, and will be ready on July 1st.

I talk a walk-through during the first week of July (it's not ready yet, you see?). The half-digested doritos in the bathroom sink tell me that some teenager doesn't know how to hold their drink. The rat turds everywhere tell me there are rats....everywhere. The holes in the walls tell me...well you get the idea.

I am understandably less than thrilled. I raise hell. They say it will all be fixed.

Two weeks later I have another walk-through....and the doritos are still there. Nice work, Sterling. Good attention to detail.

The next week I go back again...the doritos are gone, so that's a bonus. There are still holes in the walls, evidence of a lingering rat infestation, and I have serious doubts about the quality of the major appliances. I say waive the deposit or I walk. They waive the deposit. We move in.

To their credit, the rats don't seem to mind that we've moved into what was clearly their house. They help themselves to any food that we are foolish enough to leave on the counter, albeit still in it's original container. Translation: rats are chewing through bags and boxes to get to our food. Awesome.

As for the appliances....
The dishwasher leaks. One of the eyes on the stoves doesn't work. The oven produced heat, so technically it worked, however I feel that if I am able to turn the oven to 500 degrees on broil, leave it for an hour, come back and grab the metal racks in the oven with my bare hands then perhaps a little tune-up is in order?

We complain. They have repairmen come out and fix things one at a time. Mostly.

We talk a small trip to the other side of the planet (more to come on this later).

We get back state-side. I go back to work. Coming home for lunch one day I see a card conspicuously stuck in my front door. It's from an Oktibbeha County Constable. I run through a list of recently commited crimes in my head and decide to chance it and give the man a call anyway.

The constable informs me that the house that I am currently renting is being foreclosed upon. Oh joy of joys. He recommends for me to talk to my realtor. Little does he know that my realtor is a worthless pile of cow dung. I try calling Sterling. No answer. I email, leave messages.

A week later Sterling calls me back. Tells me that the home owner didn't pay his mortgage so Wells-Fargo is foreclosing on the house. Thanks for the hot tip, ass.

He says we should meet tomorrow evening and discuss my options. I say ok. I call him the next day. No answer, no returned calls, no nothing.

Two weeks later I get foreclosure notice in the mail. It's the first time I've seen a contact name/number. I go for it.

The lady on the other end is surprisingly polite. She gives me the contact info for a nice lady named Melissa who works with Wells-Fargo. I call Melissa and explain who I am and what's going on. When she asks who my realtor is I tell her. She's not a big fan either, as it turns out.

Apparently Melissa tried to call Sterling and find out who was in the house. You see banks have started doing what's called a cash-for-key option to give tennants money to motivate them to vacate a foreclosed property in an orderly and timely fashion. Melissa was instructed to make that offer to us. Sterling got wind that there was $2500 up for grabs and tried to grab it for himself. When Melissa wouldn't give it to him, he refused to give her our contact info. Classy guy, that.

I immediately contact 3 different lawyers, all of whom adivse me not to pay another dime in rent. Gladly. I also open negotiations with Wells-Fargo to see if I can buy the house on a short sale.

That pretty much brings us up to date on the story...one more thing, though. Wells-Fargo, like any good corporation that helped America into the financial turmoil we are currently experiencing, is apparently so big and huge and vast that it's like Shiva or Vishnu or one of those mutli-armed dieties from Indian culture.

Currently there are three of it's arms focused on me:

1) Wells-Fargo is approving me for a home loan.

2) Wells-Fargo is negotiation with me to buy the house.

3) Wells-Fargo is evicting me.

I can't wait to go to my court date next month with rental contract and home loan approval in hand and tell all of this to a good old fashioned down home judge. Should make for a good laugh.